Changing Dress Code Comic Strips - Page 21

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

239 Results for Changing Dress Code

View 201 - 210 results for changing dress code comic strips. Discover the best "Changing Dress Code" comics from Dilbert.com.

Emotionally Manipulative Robot Warranty

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Emotionally Manipulative Robot Warranty - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags manipulation, manipulative, manipulative behavior, robot, upsell, warranty

View Transcript

Transcript

The Emotionally Manipulative Robot. Robot: It isn't too late to buy an extended warranty for me. I mean, wow! Think about the enormous expense of fixing me if something unexpected happens. If you need me, I'll be on a wobbly ladder, changing light bulbs near the pool

Dilbert Sent To Disable Elbonian Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Sent To Disable Elbonian Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags annoyance, binary, code, coding, developing countries, frustration, internet, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have been sent to disable the Elbonian Internet as retaliation for hacking into our corporate network. Elbonian 1: Only our elites use the Internet. The rest of us don't care. Knock yourself out. Elbonian 2: Zero, zero, one, zero, one... Elbonian 3: I wish someone would just disable this thing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags executives, ceos, raise, asking for a raise, compensation, money, wages, comparison, wage discrepancy, mansion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I can only give you a 3% raise. If you want more, take it up with our CEO. Dilbert: I'd like to explain why I deserve more than a 3% raise. As a negotiating strategy, Dogbert will simultaneously read a media report about your lavish $85 million mansion. I invented three new technologies this year. Dogbert: "The toilets are solid gold." Dilbert: I wrote most of the code for our new product. Dogbert: "The helicopter pad is on the roof of the car museum." Dilbert: I worked eighty hours per week. Dogbert: "Every elevator has a full kitchen." Dilbert: I could earn more at Google or Apple... Dogbert: "Entire house rotates for optimal sun exposure." Dilbert: Do you see where I'm going with this? CEO: High-five?

Dilbert's App Evaluates Job Candidates

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert's App Evaluates Job Candidates - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social interaction, social media, coders, coding, engineers, friends, work ethic, social life, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented an app that evaluates job candidates based on their online footprint. Here's a guy with no friend, no hobbies, no family, and hundreds of high-quality code submissions to GitHub. Wait, that's me. Boss: Do you have any apps about other people?

Checking On Assumptions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Checking On Assumptions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags criticism, insult, strategy, managers, underling

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I researched the assumptions behind your strategy and discovered they are unfounded. So I guess that means you will be changing your strategy. Alice: Did it make a difference? Dilbert: Yes, in the sense that he hates me more.

Ceo's Yacht

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ceo's Yacht - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags hypocrisy, money, salary, wages, net worth, rich people, yacht, obliviousness, saving, cost

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We must learn to do more with less. Alice: You own a yacht that has an 18-hole golf course, and a landing strip for your jet, and its own zip code. CEO: I got a good deal on that. Alice: That's what the idiot that buys it form you will say, too.

Employees Keep Agreeing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Employees Keep Agreeing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags furniture, office, arrangement, laziness, loophole, efficiency, management, work ethic, excuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I told the employees about our plan to boost productivity by changing the floor layout. Now they claim they can't get their work done because the current floor plan is inefficient. Hoe do I get them to stop agreeing with me? CEO: What do you usually do?

Dilbert Teaches Robot To Code

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Teaches Robot To Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags singularity, machines, robot, technology, control, power, intelligence

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Did you teach the robot how to program? Dilbert: I did. He's a fast learner. Alice: Have you heard of something called the singularity? Dilbert: Yes. Why do you... Is it too late to say I wasn't involved?

Requesting The Slightest Change

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Requesting The Slightest Change - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags web, internet, site, code, coding, development, deadline, delay, time, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Will our new website be live this week? Developer: That depends. If you request even the slightest change, it could set things back for months. Boss: I only want to change the homepage title font. Developer: Oh, great. I should be done by next summer.

Estimating Finish Times

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Estimating Finish Times - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags website, internet, developer, code, coding, deadline, time, deception, lying, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm having trouble managing our web developer because I don't know how long things are supposed to take. Does it really take nine months to change the font on the home page? Developer: How much do I owe you? Dilbert: Tell him my project normally takes two years.