Problem Comic Strips - Page 21
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401 Results for Problem
View 201 - 210 results for problem comic strips. Discover the best "Problem" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday July 24,
2001
Tags evolution training, make it thourgh, banana, peel, gorillas, neanderthal, monkeys, jungle naimals
Transcript
Headline: Evolution Training. Dogbert stands atop a stool in front of students with a pointer in his hand. He says, "Some of you will not make it through the class." A banana who happens to be seated next to a gorilla raises its hand and asks, "May I move to a different seat?" The rest of the class looks on. Dogbert responds, "Sure... Oops. Problem solved. Carl, don't leave that where someone will slip on it."
Thursday October 25,
2001
Tags tour of accounting, random number geneartor, randomness
Transcript
Headline: Tour of Accounting. Dilbert is wiping spit off of himself with a towel. A troll tour guide says, "Over here we have our random number generator." The troll places its hands on a slab of rock and relays the message of "nine nine nine nine." Dilbert asks, "Are you sure that's random?" The troll responds, "That's the problem with randomness. You can never be sure."
Tuesday January 01,
2002
Tags winning bid contract, read the minds, competetors, bid lower, blocked by dense mass
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Dilbert, I want you to put together the winning bid for this contract." Dilbert responds, "No problem, I'll just read the minds of our competitors and bid lower." Dilbert continues, "I'm picking up something now... But it's partly blocked by a dense mass."
Tuesday January 22,
2002
Tags dilebrt the sales guy, mother, overpirced, hard to use, spit, packaging, mom, surprised, mother and son, Family
Transcript
Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert's mom is holding his product. She says, "I wouldn't buy this @#!%!!& with YOUR money." Dilbert's mom continues, "It's overpriced, hard to use, full of bugs and it solves no problem." Dilbert's mom continues, "I spit on your packaging!" Dilbert responds, "Um.. Mom.."
Monday March 18,
2002
Tags low morale, monkey at zoo, fling shit, survey, request for survey
Transcript
The Boss says to Carol, "Carol, put together a survey to find out why morale is so low." Carol responds, "Survey?!! You could ask any monkey at the zoo what the problem is." The Boss is talking to a monkey through zoo bars. The Boss says, "Do NOT fling that. I repeat..."
Thursday April 04,
2002
Tags 3 year anniversary, first meeting, project requirements, probelm
Transcript
Dilbert addresses a meeting, "Today is the three-year anniversary of our first meeting to discuss project requirements." Dilbert continues, "And we're still discussing requirements. Does anyone else see a problem here?" A coworker turns to Dilbert and says, "When you're done, can we talk about requirements?"
Friday April 05,
2002
Tags dogbert tech support., personal computer, defective, attractive package
Transcript
Dogbert Tech Support. Dogbert says into his telephone headset, "It works fine on my machine." On the other end of the line, the customer says, "Yes, but this call is about MY PC. May we talk about MY problem now?" Dogbert replies, "Okay, your PC is defective and you're selfish. That's an attractive package you've got going there."
Friday July 05,
2002
Tags improve morale, want drinking enough, coffee meetings, never leave table
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally, "I'm having these coffee meetings to find out how I can improve morale." Wally responds, "My only problem was that I wasn't drinking enough coffee with you. So now I'm good, thanks." Wally continues, "Promise me you'll never leave this table. I can't go back to the way things were."
Monday July 22,
2002
Tags bankrupt, 401k money gone, investing, competitors stock, wally rich, investing in competition
Transcript
Wally is sitting at his computer. Alice approaches and says, "Wally, what are we going to do now that we're bankrupt and our 401k money is gone?" Wally responds, "No problem. I've been investing all of my money in our competitor's stock. Now I'm rich." Alice asks, "Why do you still come to work?" Wally responds, "I don't know how to make coffee."
Friday December 27,
2002
Tags performance review, two jobs, well, attaboy, no budget for raise, cheapen
Transcript
Headline: Performance Review. The Boss says to Dilbert, "You did two jobs for a year and you did them well." The Boss continues, "I have no budget for raises, so all I can offer is an attaboy." The Boss continues, "The problem is: I don't want to cheapen the whole attaboy system."

