Read The Minds Comic Strips - Page 21

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

227 Results for Read The Minds

View 201 - 210 results for read the minds comic strips. Discover the best "Read The Minds" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Falls Off Bridge

Thank you for voting.
Boss Falls Off Bridge - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2015's comic on:


Tags #walking, #meeting, #meetings, #accident, #difficult, #gimmick, #manager, #idea, #ideas, #distraction, #Sports, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: My new thing is taking long walks instead of having meetings. Wow. It is hard to walk, read, think, talk, and drink coffee at the same time. Dilbert: He fell off a bridge. Carol: That's why I schedule walking meetings for him.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 2015's comic on:


Tags #computer, #robot, #replacement, #doctor, #medicine, #obsolete, #job, #diagnose, #necessity, #technology, #invention, #business, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: IBM's Watson supercomputer has diagnosed your symptoms. The computer just ordered the meds you need. They will be delivered in an hour by drone. Dilbert: Looks like your job as a doctor is becoming obsolete. Doctor: Ha ha! No. You still need a doctor and a nurse to make the system work. For example, the computer can't read its own screen and speak those words to patients. Dilbert: Actually, it can. Doctor: But the computer doesn't have a nurse. Dilbert: What does the nurse do? Nurse: I stab him if he tries to do more than read the screen.

Boss Gets A Nickname

Thank you for voting.
Boss Gets A Nickname - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2016's comic on:


Tags #scientist, #nickname, #obliviousness, #stephen hawking, #black holes, #space, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Our new nickname for you is based on the work of Stephen Hawking. Hawking is one of the greatest scientific minds of our time. Boss: I like it! Dilbert: I need him to make a decision today. Carol: Toss it in the black hole.

Tell Me What Was In The Email

Thank you for voting.
Tell Me What Was In The Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 01, 2016's comic on:


Tags #email, #laziness, #attention, #detail, #tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I don't have time to read your long email. Tell me what it said. Dilbert: I wrote a long email because a summary would be dangerously misleading. Boss: I'll be the judge of that. Dilbert: How?!!!

Alice Gives Approval

Thank you for voting.
Alice Gives Approval - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 2016's comic on:


Tags #deal, #support, #negotiations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our pointy-haired boss asked me to get everyone's buy-in on this. Alice: I'll agree to your stupid idea if you support my great idea later. Dilbert: Deal. Alice: Should I read it? Dilbert: I don't see why.

Wally Gives Approval

Thank you for voting.
Wally Gives Approval - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #signature, #ignorance, #reading, #fine print

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need everyone's buy-in on this. Wally: Do I have to read it? Dilbert: No. Wally: That's the sort of idea I can get behind.

Ceo Fixes His Problem

Thank you for voting.
Ceo Fixes His Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2016's comic on:


Tags #product safety, #danger, #battery, #recall, #cell phone, #samsung, #media, #Entertainment, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: The press says I need to resign because of our exploding phones fiasco. Dilbert: Maybe you can change their minds by sending the press our new model that doesn't explode. CEO: I already sent them the exploding phones and said it was our new models. Your way left too much to chance.

Strategy Document

Thank you for voting.
Strategy Document - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 22, 2016's comic on:


Tags #strategy, #obliviousness, #insult

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I saw your email about destroying the company. Boss: Huh? The only email I sent you was my strategy for the coming year. Dilbert: Well, maybe I read it too fast.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 02, 2017's comic on:


Tags #tldr, #email, #communication, #patience, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Did you read my email? Dilbert: No, it was too long. Man: Maybe you could read it when you have more time. Dilbert: I never have time to read email messages that are too long. Maybe you could rewrite it to be shorter. Man: I don't have time to rewrite it. Dilbert: And I don't have time to read it. Man: If no one reads that email, it will mean I wasted two hours writing it. Dilbert: Plus, you're wasting my time right now. Don't forget to include that in your failure assessment. Man: I had high hopes for that email. Dilbert: It's a sunk cost. Let it go.

Imagine He Is Naked

Thank you for voting.
Imagine He Is Naked  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #public speaking, #presentation, #Advice, #nervous, #naked, #fear

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Do you have any tips for my presentation to the CEO? Boss: When you are presenting, imagine you are naked and everyone is laughing at you. Asok: Why? Boss: It's just something I read. I might have the details wrong.