Taking Chance Comic Strips - Page 21
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207 Results for Taking Chance
View 201 - 207 results for taking chance comic strips. Discover the best "Taking Chance" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday August 02,
2020
Dilbert Tells The Odds
Tags #business, #decision, #estimate, #managers & supervisors, #miscommunication, #odds, #technology, #wrong
Transcript
dilbert: i estimate odds at a 70% chance things go well, and a 30% chance we lose money on the deal. boss: if we lose money, will you admit you were wrong? dilbert: how could i be wrong? i'm just telling you the odds. boss: if we lose money, that's on you for recommending it. dilbert: um...no. i'm telling you the odds and letting you decide. boss: but you're the one saying this is such a great deal. dilbert upsetting and yelling forcing face mask off his face: i'm only telling you the odds, you pea-brained ignoramus!!! boss: so, you won't admit you were wrong? dilbert's face mask is over his eyes.
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Saturday August 01,
2020
Wally And Truama
Tags #accident, #business, #news, #technology, #television, #trauma, #block, #defense, #video
Transcript
Wally putting on jacket: I'm taking the rest of the day off to recover from trauma. i accidentally saw a video clip from tv news. boss: can't you block that? wally: i tried, but they keep finding ways to sneak it past my defenses.
Thursday December 31,
2020
Dogbert The Auditor
Tags #business, #business ethics, #consultant, #company, #fee, #fraud, #crime, #report, #question
Transcript
dogbert: for a reasonable fee, i will audit your company and find any fraud or crime if it exists. dilbert: what's to stop you from taking bribes from the fraudsters and reporting that everything is fine? dogbert: my business model depends on you not asking that kind of question.
Sunday April 04,
2021
Taking Time Off
Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #vacation, #paid time off, #critical, #essential, #system, #migration, #kidding, #success, #zoom, #call, #valuable, #asset, #engagement
Transcript
boss and dilbert on video call. dilbert: is it okay if i take next week off? boss: are you kidding? we're in the most critical month of the system migration. you're essential to our succcess. all hands must be on deck. dilbert: really? it seems as if all i do is listen to other people say useless stuff on zoom calls. boss: my goodness, no! employees are our most valuable asset! we can't succeed unless we have 100% employee engagement. dilbert: i took all of last week off for vacation, and no one noticed. boss: next time, start with that.
Sunday May 02,
2021
Remote Workers Do Not Mate
Tags #appearance, #dating, #love & dating, #walking, #outdoors, #dating app, #woman, #app, #reproduction, #inner qualities, #goodbye, #genes
Transcript
dilbert and dogbert walking outside. dogbert: they say most people meet their future mates at work. now that you are working from home, your odds of mating just turned negative. you could try using a dating app to find a woman, but then you'd need to rely on your looks. obviously, that's a dead end. your best chance of reproduction has always been to wear down a co-worker over several years. women need time to get over your appearance, and to appreciate your inner qualities. we should have a goodbye party for your genes. dilbert: maybe next time we could walk and not talk. dogbert: maybe.