Valuable Advice Comic Strips - Page 21
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259 Results for Valuable Advice
View 201 - 210 results for valuable advice comic strips. Discover the best "Valuable Advice" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday December 23,
2014
Carol Has Passion For Her Job
Tags Advice, boredom, boring, email, fake passion, forwarded email, mindless, passion, success, warren buffet, work ethic
Transcript
Carol: Warren Buffett says my career will be better if I show passion for my job. I'll have to fake the passion because everything I do in this job is mindless and boring. Later. Carol: Woo-hoo! I forwarded an email!
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday January 03,
2015
Single Dilbert Is Valuable
Tags competition, dating, low standards, Men, market value, single guy, low bar, tall, employed, height, relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm starting to realize that my market value as a single guy is higher than I thought. Men such as you have set the bar so low that all I need to do is have a job and be taller than most women in heels. I thought they were turned on by my tube clothing, but they actually like me for me. Wally: You're welcome.
Tuesday January 13,
2015
The Illusion Of Leadership
Tags absent mindedness, Advice, forget, forgetfulness, jargon, leadership, managers, managers & supervisors, business
Transcript
Boss: I forget why I walked over here. Dilbert: Were you planning to spew empty jargon in my direction to create the illusion of leadership? Boss: Oh, right. But now it feels as if the moment has passed.
Saturday February 14,
2015
Fifty Tips For Success
Tags Advice, career advice, obliviousness, secret, success, tech millionaire
Transcript
Asok: A 27-year-old tech millionaire published his list of fifty things you need to do to succeed. Dilbert: In other words, he has no idea why he succeeded. Asok: Sure he does. He even has a chart of his top thirty... priorities. Okay, I hear it now.
Saturday February 21,
2015
Boss Has Investment Tips For Asok
Tags Advice, bad advice, diversification, investment, obliviousness, stock market, money
Transcript
Asok: Do you have any investment tips? Boss: You're asking the right person! I can teach you how to time the market, catch a falling knife, and invest in a dead-cat bounce. That's my system. Asok: What about diversification? Boss: I don't invest in anything I can't spell.
Monday February 23,
2015
Technical Analysis
Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, stock market, stocks, squirrel sitting, clown shoulder, technical analysis, money
Transcript
Lessons in Investing. Boss: You should buy a stock whenever the chart looks like a squirrel sitting on a clown's shoulder. That's called "technical analysis." Asok: I'm not going to do that. Boss: Good. Because it doesn't work if everyone does it.
Tuesday February 24,
2015
Everyone Can Beat The Market Average
Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, investor, stock market, stock reserch, money
Transcript
Boss: Asok, you can beat market averages by doing your own stock research. Asok: So... you believe every investor can beat the average by reading the same information? Boss: Yes. Asok: Makes you wonder why more people don't do it. Boss: Just lazy, I guess.
Thursday March 12,
2015
Learning To Avoid Responsibility
Tags mentoring, mentor, mentors, protege, criticism, responsibility, Advice
Transcript
CEO: No matter how much I mentor you, you still act the same. Wally: That's because you're a terrible mentor. You owe me an apology for wasting my time. CEO: I don't think the problem is on my end. Wally: Are you teaching me how to avoid taking responsibility?
Monday March 16,
2015
Ceo Mentors Wally To No Avail
Tags Promotion, saving face, executives, bad advice, bad ideas, mentor, mentoring
Transcript
CEO: I've been mentoring Wally for over a week and he's still useless. But we need to promote him to Vice President so it looks as if my mentoring works. Catbert: That might be a bad idea in the long run. CEO: What is this "long run" people keep harping about?