Valuable Advice Comic Strips - Page 21

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256 Results for Valuable Advice

View 201 - 210 results for valuable advice comic strips. Discover the best "Valuable Advice" comics from Dilbert.com.

Carol Has Passion For Her Job

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Carol Has Passion For Her Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, boredom, boring, email, fake passion, forwarded email, mindless, passion, success, warren buffet, work ethic

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Carol: Warren Buffett says my career will be better if I show passion for my job. I'll have to fake the passion because everything I do in this job is mindless and boring. Later. Carol: Woo-hoo! I forwarded an email!

Single Dilbert Is Valuable

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Single Dilbert Is Valuable - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags competition, dating, low standards, Men, market value, single guy, low bar, tall, employed, height, relationships

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Dilbert: I'm starting to realize that my market value as a single guy is higher than I thought. Men such as you have set the bar so low that all I need to do is have a job and be taller than most women in heels. I thought they were turned on by my tube clothing, but they actually like me for me. Wally: You're welcome.

The Illusion Of Leadership

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The Illusion Of Leadership - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags absent mindedness, Advice, forget, forgetfulness, jargon, leadership, managers, managers & supervisors, business

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Boss: I forget why I walked over here. Dilbert: Were you planning to spew empty jargon in my direction to create the illusion of leadership? Boss: Oh, right. But now it feels as if the moment has passed.

Fifty Tips For Success

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Fifty Tips For Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, career advice, obliviousness, secret, success, tech millionaire

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Asok: A 27-year-old tech millionaire published his list of fifty things you need to do to succeed. Dilbert: In other words, he has no idea why he succeeded. Asok: Sure he does. He even has a chart of his top thirty... priorities. Okay, I hear it now.

Boss Has Investment Tips For Asok

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Boss Has Investment Tips For Asok - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, bad advice, diversification, investment, obliviousness, stock market, money

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Asok: Do you have any investment tips? Boss: You're asking the right person! I can teach you how to time the market, catch a falling knife, and invest in a dead-cat bounce. That's my system. Asok: What about diversification? Boss: I don't invest in anything I can't spell.

Technical Analysis

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Technical Analysis - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, stock market, stocks, squirrel sitting, clown shoulder, technical analysis, money

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Lessons in Investing. Boss: You should buy a stock whenever the chart looks like a squirrel sitting on a clown's shoulder. That's called "technical analysis." Asok: I'm not going to do that. Boss: Good. Because it doesn't work if everyone does it.

Everyone Can Beat The Market Average

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Everyone Can Beat The Market Average - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Advice, bad advice, investing, investor, stock market, stock reserch, money

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Boss: Asok, you can beat market averages by doing your own stock research. Asok: So... you believe every investor can beat the average by reading the same information? Boss: Yes. Asok: Makes you wonder why more people don't do it. Boss: Just lazy, I guess.

Learning To Avoid Responsibility

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Learning To Avoid Responsibility - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mentoring, mentor, mentors, protege, criticism, responsibility, Advice

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CEO: No matter how much I mentor you, you still act the same. Wally: That's because you're a terrible mentor. You owe me an apology for wasting my time. CEO: I don't think the problem is on my end. Wally: Are you teaching me how to avoid taking responsibility?

Ceo Mentors Wally To No Avail

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Ceo Mentors Wally To No Avail - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Promotion, saving face, executives, bad advice, bad ideas, mentor, mentoring

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CEO: I've been mentoring Wally for over a week and he's still useless. But we need to promote him to Vice President so it looks as if my mentoring works. Catbert: That might be a bad idea in the long run. CEO: What is this "long run" people keep harping about?

Deserve Is For Losers

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Deserve Is For Losers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deserve, loser, sympathy, Advice

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Tina: I didn't get the promotion I deserved. Alice: Deserve is a loser word used by losers when they lose. Tina: Whose side are you on? Alice: The winning side. Was that unclear?