Cleansed Online Support Comic Strips - Page 22

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

216 Results for Cleansed Online Support

View 211 - 216 results for cleansed online support comic strips. Discover the best "Cleansed Online Support" comics from Dilbert.com.

New Statue In The Lobby

Thank you for voting.
New Statue In The Lobby - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #the boss, #criminal, #tech support, #darned, #good, #report

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Where's the career criminal I hired to do tech support? He was last seen talking to you. Alice: Rumor has it that someone murdered him, covered him in with-out and tried to pass him off as a statue in the lobby. Dilbert: I would report this if it did't look so darned good here.

Adjust The Data

Thank you for voting.
Adjust The Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 20, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office, #research, #tests, #data

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The test data doesn't support our plan. Boss: We know our plan is brilliant, so just adjust the data to support it. Dilbert: You mean falsify the data. Boss: Let's not get hung up on the definition of things.

Press Release

Thank you for voting.
Press Release - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #unethical, #scientists, #press, #question, #overkill

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The unethical scientist we hired to support our product claims started today. Boss: Write a press release that says whatever we want him to say and put his name on it. Dilbert: Should we show it to him? Boss: That feels like overkill.

Dilbert Quits To Get A Raise

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Quits To Get A Raise - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 16, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #boss, #conscience, #rethink, #quit, #raise, #going along, #don't, #ruin

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I can't in good conscience support inaccurate health claims about our products. I quit. Boss: I'll give you 20% raise if you stay. Wally: I quit too, because of all the ethnics and stuffs. Dilbert: Don't ruin this for me.

Centers Of Excellence

Thank you for voting.
Centers Of Excellence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 2019's comic on:


Tags #lie, #managers & supervisors, #office, #excellence

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: make a slide deck that says our "centers of excellence" are creating more excellence. dilbert: do we have any data to support that claim? the boss: no. dilbert: you want me to lie? the boss: is that suddenly too much to ask.

The New Consultant

Thank you for voting.
The New Consultant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 23, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #success

View Transcript

Transcript

the new consultant: i'll need the support of every department to make this project a success. boss: i won't get any credit if your project succeeds, and you'll be gone in a month. consultant: can i count on you to not sabotage the project? boss: you're coming off as needy.