Competition (Psychology) Comic Strips - Page 22
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237 Results for Competition (Psychology)
View 211 - 220 results for competition (psychology) comic strips. Discover the best "Competition (Psychology)" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 30,
2018
Arguing With Idiots
Tags happiness, secret, tip, arguing, psychology
Transcript
Asok: Wally, how do you stay happy while the rest of us are stressed out? Wally: It's easy. Instead of arguing with idiots, I pretend I agree with them so they'll leave me alone. Asok: That sounds risky. Wally: Yes, I agree.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday June 10,
2018
Tags competition, replacement, hiring, job description
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I need you to write up your job description for me. Wally: Is that because you're planning to hire someone to replace me? Boss: I need it by tomorrow. Wally: Job description: leverage platform technologies to maximize software architecture optimization via nanotubes. Here you go. Boss: Can you start on Monday? Man: I changed my mind.
Tuesday November 20,
2018
Boss Email Password
Tags business, competition, email, obliviousness, security, strategy
Transcript
Boss: We need to find out who leaked our strategy to our competition. Alice: Is your email password still 123? Boss: Stop changing the subject.
Sunday November 25,
2018
Tags career, employees, office, office workers, training, trick, sabatoge
Transcript
Boss: Wally will train you for your new job. You'll need to figure out how much of what he says is real training and how much is career sabotage. Man: Career sabotage? Boss: Employees don't like competition. Only the top 20% get bonuses. They'll do what they can to keep you out of that group. Man: I assume you're exaggerating. Boss: You'll see. Wally: Has anyone told you about no-pants Fridays?
Monday March 11,
2019
Marketing Lies
Tags Dilbert, boss, headphones, competition, meeting, marketing, lies
Transcript
Dilbert: Our new headphones product is better than the competition in every way. Boss: Excellent. I'll get marketing involved to tell a bunch of lies about all of that. Dilbert: Why would they need to lie? Boss: They're kind of set in their ways.
Friday June 14,
2019
Evil Marketing
Tags business, business ethics, chimps, evil, marketing, office, product
Transcript
dilbert, the boss and dogbert at conference room table. the boss: our competition released a product that makes our product look like it was designed by chimps. the boss: that's why i hired the world's most evil marketing expert to help us close the perception gap. the boss: should we focus on our value proposition? dogbert: if that means accusing them of crimes they didn't commit, then yes.
Saturday June 15,
2019
First Time Doing Marketing
Tags business, business ethics, criminals, marketing, office
Transcript
dilbert, dogbert and the boss at conference room table. dogbert: your competition has a superior product, but you can compensate by branding them as evil. dilbert: we can say they charge too much. dogbert: or...we can say their leather cases are made from the skin of executed criminals. dilbert: but that would not be true. dogbert: first time doing marketing?
Friday October 04,
2019
Garbage Man Breaks Fourth Wall
Tags psychology, reality, parody, broken, business, garbage, Comic, indistinguishable
Transcript
dilbert: reality has become so absurd that it is indistinguishable from parody. how can we fix that? garbage man: there is nothing to fix. reality has always been the same as parody. you just didn't notice until now. dilbert: you're joking, right? garbage man: check out this comic strip called "dilbert"
Wednesday October 09,
2019
Your Real Scheme
Tags office workers, office, business, scheme, power, costs, mind, reader, psychology
Transcript
dilbert: and this method will reduce costs by thirty percent. ted: nice try, but i know your real scheme is to grab power. dilbert: you're not a good mind reader ted: and yet i knew you would say i can't read minds, explain that
Monday October 14,
2019
Mad Or Flirting
Tags flirting, relationships, feelings, awkward, psychology, anger, office workers
Transcript
dilbert: why are you mad at me? Carol: i'm not dilbert: oh. i'm not good at reading people's feelings carol: true dilbert: are you flirting with me now? carol getting up: i'm going to sit over here

