Coolest Guy Comic Strips - Page 22

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

375 Results for Coolest Guy

View 211 - 220 results for coolest guy comic strips. Discover the best "Coolest Guy" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hi, handsome. Are you free for lunch?" "Are you selling something, or do you have a horrible defect that isn't apparent?" "Is it so hard to believe that a hot, intelligent, sane woman would be attracted to a man like you?" "Gaaa!!! It's worse than I thought!" "Maybe we could just drink coffee and talk about the last episode of Battlestar Galactica." "GAAA!!!" "Get away from me, you perfect monster!" "There must be a guy in the engineering department who will date me." "Hi." "What's wrong with you?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #competition, #sales, #sales personnel

View Transcript

Transcript

The land of unrealistic business assumptions. Dilbert: We need to find some assumptions about future sales. Dang! There's only one way across and it's blocked by an inebriated hillbilly. Dogbert: In the land of unrealistic assumptions, this guy is your only competitor.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #loud guy section, #no loud guy, #date, #man screams, #stories, #noise, #restaurant, #customers, #hostess, #table nearby

View Transcript

Transcript

Would you like to be seated in the loud guy section or no loud guy? Menu "They both sound good. We'll try the loud guy section." "I hope he has good stories." "AND THEN!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

There's a little thing I like to do before any meeting with a marketing guy. BONK! "This way there's more congruence between the things you say and the way you look."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, interview the guy in our conference room and see what he can do for us." "I'm going to bonk your head on the table. If it sounds empty, you'll work in marketing." "How did it go?" "I bonked too hard. We just got a new sales guy."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Dilbert, meet your new coworker, Phil O'Dendron." "Phil is a potted plant. He'll sit in your cubicle all day while you try to work." "Does it talk?" "He has three stories that he repeats in an infinite loop." "He'll begin with his reasons for why you should use his tax guy." "Then he'll do a recap of recent reality TV shows." "And last but not least, 'The way we did it at my last job.'" sob "How do you plan to cut expenses?" "Well, performance bonuses are under control."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Our sales guy vastly underbid a job. Now it's my project to install the system in a way that's profitable. "Blame your customer for underspecifying the features then charge her through the nose for change orders." "Three million dollars for an electrical plug?" "The base model uses a potato battery."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

A disturbing number of you have requested the return of Loud Howard. "Loud Howard is one-dimensional. There is nothing clever or insightful about him. He is simply loud." "It is a mystery why anyone would want more of this guy." "THEY LOVE ME!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

We've got a dead guy in cubicle D-32. "Uh-oh." "Do you have any idea how much paperwork it causes when someone dies in one of my cubicles?" "Ten more feet to the marketing department."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

I need some data from an unreachable guy named Ed. What should I do? "Just make up a bunch of data like everyone else does." "Everyone else does that?" "Are you doubting my data?"