Director Of The Green Comic Strips - Page 22
261 Results for Director Of The Green
View 211 - 220 results for director of the green comic strips. Discover the best "Director Of The Green" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share February 01, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: "Alice, did you call the director of human resources a "furry log"?" Alice: "Yes" The Boss: "I can't tell if you're promoting teamwork with a cute nickname or creating a hostile environment." "Which is it?" Alice: "It's teamwork, you squirrel-infested stump."
Share February 04, 2005's comic on:
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I might change my department's name." "To "Workplace Services." BU-WHA-HA-HA-HA!!" "When things don't sound evil enough on their own, I like to toss in a bu-wha-ha-ha-ha."
Share January 31, 2006's comic on:
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources<Br>"Alice, you've been accused of making dismissive facial expressions." "You have also muttered the following sounds during meetings: piff, bah, ffff, and ssstoop." "Did anyone complain about this expression? I like to use it in these situations." "No, that's still good."
Share June 06, 2006's comic on:
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "What?" "You've been randomly selected for a drug test." "I have a shy bladder. I can't produce under pressure!!!" "Do it now or be fired." "Thanks for understanding." "DO IT! DO IT! DO IT! DO IT!"
Share December 05, 2006's comic on:
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "Every absence counts as one 'occurrence' whether it is one day or more." "I just got a headache. I'll see you in a year. Or as I like to call it, one occurrence." "If something is worth having, it's worth abusing."
Share December 15, 2006's comic on:
The director of marketing needs an engineering resource. "I'm giving you to him because I hate his stupid guts." "What did I do to deserve this?" "Sorry I'm late. I had to drown a burrito."
Share June 04, 2000's comic on:
Catbert, the Evil H.R. director says to Wally, "Wally, our auditors found 40 gigabits of bikini pictures on your PC." Wally is thinking the same thing. Catbert says to Wally, "That is grounds for dismissal. How do you plead?" Wally thinks to himself, "Innocent. Technically, they didn't find any pictures." Wally says to Catbert, "What they found were zeroes and ones resting harmlessly on magnetic media." Wally continues, "It was the auditors themselves who activated thoe harmless bits to form pictures on the screen." Wally says to Catbert, "I demand that those godless auditors be fired!" Wally also says, "And if it's not too much trouble, I'd like my zeroes and ones back." After Wally's meeting with Catbert, Dilberts asks Wally "Was justice served?" Wally responds, "It's a gray area."
Share March 23, 2007's comic on:
Catbert: Evil director of human resources "I'd like to discuss my career plan." "The plan is that we'll keep you around until we find a starving Elbonian to do your job for less." "In other words, blah, blah, maybe someday you will get a promotion."
Share April 09, 2007's comic on:
Catbert: Evil director of human resources "I hired two people to work on your project." "One is a mumbler and the other one is hard of hearing but doesn't know it." "Mmmm, afterglow."