Fire Comic Strips - Page 22
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221 Results for Fire
View 211 - 220 results for fire comic strips. Discover the best "Fire" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 24,
2019
Nervous About Presentation
Tags Advice, managers & supervisors, nervous, office workers, presentation
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm nervous about the presentation I have to give to the board. Do you have any advice? Boss: Don't blow it, or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: I heard it's good to imagine the audience naked. Boss: Report yourself to H.R.
Saturday January 18,
2020
Poison Pill
Tags co-worker, cross-train, business, relationship, training, bad, fire, poison pill, planner
Transcript
dilbert: i can't shake the feeling that you are intentionally doing a bad job training me how to do your job functions. ted: i'm omitting important steps, so you'll fail hard should i get fired and you are asked to fill in. it's called a "poison pill." dilbert: you're a good planner.
Saturday February 15,
2020
Before Or After Firing
Tags business, managers & supervisors, prototype, request, fire
Transcript
dilbert: we destroyed all of the prototypes you requested. boss: i never asked for anything remotely like that. dilbert: ted said you did. boss: did he tell you that before or after i fired him last week?
Wednesday July 15,
2020
Boss Fired For Being White Supremacist
Tags business, managers & supervisors, racism, fired, employees, white supremacist, apathy, career, punch, witness, denial
Transcript
ceo: i have to fire you because employees are saying you are a white supremacist. boss: but i'm not. ceo: doesn't matter. i care more about my career than your life. boss: you're firing me just to look good? ceo: and i'll need to punch you in front of witnesses.
Tuesday November 10,
2020
Ted Liked A Tweet
Tags employment, managers & supervisors, fired, business, twitter, tweet, hacked, technology, social media, file, lie, plausible, liked, unacceptable
Transcript
boss: ted, i have to fire you for liking an unacceptable tweet seven years ago on twitter. ed: it..it..wasn't me. someone hacked my account, or maybe my finger slipped. boss: which lie do you want me to put in your file? ted: did either of them sound plausible?
Wednesday December 16,
2020
Ted And His Laptop
Tags managers & supervisors, employment, fired, laptop, technology
Transcript
boss: today is your last day with the company, ted. so i need your company laptop back. ted: or else what? you'll fire me twice? boss: let's say you're not officially fired until you return the laptop. ted: and if i don't bring it back, will i never be fired? boss: um...
Saturday March 13,
2021
Disinfecting Keyboard
Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, fire, software, vendors, disinfect, keyboard, random, message, accident, mistake
Transcript
dilbert: i fired all of our software vendors and erased my hard drive as you ordered. boss holding bottle of disinfectant: really? i was disinfecting my keyboard, and i must have sent you a random message by accident. oops.
Wednesday June 23,
2021
Ted Will Train You
Tags business, managers & supervisors, training, absence, coffee, helpful, problem, successful, sarcasm
Transcript
boss: ask ted to show you how to do his job functions before he leaves for his new job. panel changes to office building. dilbert: what if he isn't helpful? boss: then i'll fire you for failing. panel changes back in office: dilbert: do you see any problem with the approach? boss: no. it's worked for years.
Saturday June 26,
2021
Too Busy To Train
Tags business, jobs, managers & supervisors, two, replacement, quit, death, stare, new, person, sarcasm
Transcript
dilbert: i'm working two jobs since ted quit. maybe you could fire a replacement for ted. boss: that won't work because you're too busy to train a new person. panel changes building. voice from building: stop making that death stare and get back to your two jobs.
Monday June 28,
2021
Firing By Text
Tags business, employment, text, smartphone, fire, remote, workforce, thumbs-up, sarcasm
Transcript
boss: the best part of having a remote workforce is firing them by text. boss typing on smartphone. Boss: ted, you're fired. tap tap tap. catbert: it's done? boss: no, i also need to give a thumbs-up to his crying face emoji.


