Idea Comic Strips - Page 22
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Character
333 Results for Idea
View 211 - 220 results for idea comic strips. Discover the best "Idea" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday July 06,
2009
Tags meeting, idea, unethical, evil, corrupt, business
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We'll build a factory in every state." Dogbert says, "Politicians will vote to throw huge pork projects our way to benefit their home states." The boss says, "You're turning capitalism against democracy." Dogbert says, "You say weiner, I say winner."
Friday August 21,
2009
Tags meeting, finances, idea, ridiculous, asking, unsure, corrupt, business
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We're getting into the financial services game." Dogbert says, "That way all of our products can be imaginary." Man says, "Can you give me reliable investment advice?" Man says, "Yes, as far as I know."
Wednesday September 09,
2009
Tags analysis, idea, suggestion, complaining, Advice, greed, science
Transcript
Dilbert says, "According to my analysis, all future ideas are already covered by over-general patents." Dilbert says, "Our best strategy is to get out of this business and become trademark infringement lawyers." The boss says, "I don't know how to be a lawyer." Catbert says, "That only matters if you take cases on a contingency basis."
Monday September 14,
2009
Tags sitting, talking, meeting, idea, changing, greed, dangerous, mean, cruel, business
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We need to make our pricing plan more confusing." Dogbert says, "And change our packaging to that hard plastic that always cuts the consumes' hands." Dogbert says, "I've been in a bad mood since everyone started talking about capping my excessive pay."
Saturday October 03,
2009
Tags demanding, stock, prices, conspiracy, idea, alien
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We need another economic bubble to drive up our stock value." Dogbert says, "Assemble the illuminati!" Man says, "As usual, I'll create the media frenzy, Dogbert will manipulate prices, and IXPU will vaporize the whistle-blowers."
Monday October 05,
2009
Tags sitting, review, criticism, ridicule, nervous, frustration, useless
Transcript
Alice says, "It's funny that you're evaluating me." Alice says, "Because I understand how to do your job, but you have no idea how to do my job." Alice says, "For example, right now you're going to say something that doesn't help the stockholders."
Friday October 30,
2009
Tags sitting, idea, moving, identity, theft, introduction
Transcript
The boss says, "We're moving our data center to Elbonia to save money." Dilbert says, "That seems a bit dangerous since every Elbonian is an identity thief." The Boss says, "What?" It seemed like an exaggeration, but it wasn't. Elbonian says ,"Hi, I'm old man Podemkin." Elbonian says, "I was him this morning!"
Tuesday November 17,
2009
Tags sitting, meeting, business, venture, idea, objecting, ridicule, criticism, scheme
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We're going into the internet news business." Dilbert says, "We're hiring reporters?" Dogbert says, "No, we'll summarize stories from other sites and provide links." Dilbert says, "So?we'll be parasites?" Dogbert says, "Go buy a vinyl record, Grandpa."
Monday November 23,
2009
Tags sitting, talking, vendor, pitching, idea, praying, agreeing, begging, promises, ridiculous
Transcript
Man says, "We have the best hidden costs of any vendor." Man says, "Our upgrade and maintenance fees won't kick in until you've already received a bonus for reducing costs." Man thinks, "Please, please, please be a sociopath." Wally says, "Sounds good. I'm not a big fan of our stockholders."
Wednesday November 25,
2009
Tags sitting, meeting, idea, ridicule, contradiction, misunderstood, stupidity, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "We need more of what the management experts call 'Employee engagement.'" The boss says, "I don't know the details, but it has something to do with you idiots working harder for the same pay." Dilbert says, "Is anything different on your end?" The boss says, "I think I'm supposed to be happier."


