Retail Business Comic Strips - Page 22
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1000 Results for Retail Business
View 211 - 220 results for retail business comic strips. Discover the best "Retail Business" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 07,
2011
Tags engineers, managers & supervisors, ventriloquism, finishing projects, early, powerpoint, presentation, executive retreat, dead boss hand puppet, business
Transcript
Man says, "The engineering department is finishing all of their projects early and we don't know why." CEO says, "Tell them to do a powerpoint presentation at the next executive retreat to share their methods." Asok says, "Now it's my turn to use the dead boss hand puppet!" Alice says, "Uh-oh."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday April 09,
2011
Tags inventions, managers & supervisors, portal, parallel uiverse, more prodcutive, universe, cops, alice killed boss, business
Transcript
Asok says, "I created a portal to a parallel universe. My success was possible because Alice killed our boss so we are all more productive." Alice says, "Step aside. The cops have been sniffing around and I need something from the other universe." Alice says, "Look on the bright side, Asok. Some other universe just got a lot more productive."
Wednesday April 13,
2011
Tags appeal, bad person, business ethics, comparison shopping, guilt, molt, prevents competitors, raising prices
Transcript
Dilbert: Our products only appeal to people who aren't good at comparison shopping. But I justify it because our existence prevents competitors from raising prices. Am I a bad person? Dogbert: I molt a little bit every time you talk.
Friday April 15,
2011
Tags big business, children drawing & painting, executives, chalky substance, layers of mangement, new layers, p, avp, director, doplphon, inanimate object
Transcript
CEO: I'm adding a few layers of management below me. The new layers are VP, AVP, Director, dolphin, inanimate object, and chalky substance. If you have any issue, I encourage you to talk to the chalky substance.
Saturday April 16,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, embarrassment, internet & world wide web, developed app, spare time, awful thing, lees hinest, marketing, business
Transcript
Ted: I developed this app in my spare time. What do you think? Dilbert: I think you made spare time look like an awful thing. If you'd like a less honest answer, I can recommend someone in marketing. Ted: I might try that.
Thursday April 21,
2011
Tags managers & supervisors, questioning, suspicion, schedule meetings, excuse, do nothing, disbelief, scheduling meetings, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you mind if I ask Carol to help me schedule these meetings? Boss: Ooh... that's no good. She'd use it as an excuse to do absolutely nothing else for a week. Dilbert: Is it okay if I just stare at you in disbelief? Boss: Shouldn't you be scheduling some meetings?
Tuesday April 26,
2011
Tags business ethics, health insurance, reduce expenses, radiation dosimeters, wrongness, policy
Transcript
Boss: The company is trying to reduce expenses, so you need to pay for your own radiation dosimeters. Dilbert: We'll just stare at you until you understand the wrongness of that policy. Boss: Still nothing. One hour later
Sunday April 17,
2011
Tags business ethics, language, best shore, off shore, some countries, better than others, racists
Transcript
Boss: And we plan to bestshore the production. Dilbert: What? Boss: We say bestshore now instead of offshore. Dilbert: Is that because we never tried to pick the best shore until now? Boss: Of course we tried to pick the best shore! Dilbert: But we never succeeded because we're incompetent? Boss: All I'm saying is that some countries are better than others! Wally: We're racists?
Sunday April 24,
2011
Tags fraternization, joking, agenda, know anything, important he is, like his jokes, late for dinner, jokes, table, meeting, laughter, business
Transcript
Boss: The first thing on the agenda... Dilbert: Hold on. I don't know anything about this guy. Boss: What's the difference? Dilbert: I need to know how important he is. Should I pretend to like his jokes? Should I nod in agreement no matter what he says? Man: You can call me anything. Just don't call me late for dinner. Dilbert: Ha ha ha ha ha!! I hope I didn't waste that.
Sunday May 01,
2011
Tags boats, business ethics, new boat, engineers, skills, boss's boat, picture, nautical interests
Transcript
Boss: Who wants to see a picture of my new boat? Dilbert: That's a very good question. If we consider the fact that we work much harder than he does... Carol: And we have valuable engineering skills, whereas he can't operate the GPS in his SUV... and for some reason we don't get paid enough to buy impressive boats. Dilbert: And we have no nautical interests whatsoever. I think your best bet is people who don't know you. Man: And you are? Boss: This only works if we don't get too familiar.

