Eat Card Comic Strips - Page 23

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

260 Results for Eat Card

View 221 - 230 results for eat card comic strips. Discover the best "Eat Card" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #secretary, #busy day, #phone rings, #lunch, #meetings, #bad timing

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Don't talk to me now, Im trying to think. ONE HOUR LATER Alice: Im on the phone. TWO HOURS LATER Alice: Im late for a meeting. THREE HOURS LATER Alice: Come back when Im not busy. FOUR HOURS LATER ALICE: Please. Im trying to eat my lunch. FIVE HOURS LATER Alice: Okay. this is a perfect time, what can I do for you? Dilbert: Okay, so.... ring Alice: I think your problem is bad timing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #exit strategy, #serial talker, #infinite unrelated, #engineers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Talk to Allen about this. Dilbert: I'll need an exit strategy. He's a serial talker. I'll be trapped for hours while he strings together infinite, unrelated stories. Boss: Engineers have weird problems. Dilbert: What could I eat that would make me puke in ten minutes?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers & peripherals, #data werewolves, #elbonian hackers, #entrails, #linkedin, #passwords, #servers, #supernatural beings, #usernames

View Transcript

Transcript

Mordac: Elbonian hackers stole a million usernames and passwords from our servers. So I send an army of data werewolves to track down the perpetrators and eat their entrails. Boss: How did you find an army of data werewolves? Mordac: LinkedIn

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #apathy, #computer programmers, #preventer of information, #business case, #teamwork seminar, #goldfish crackers

View Transcript

Transcript

Mordac: I, Mordac, the preventer of information services, reject your business case because you used the old template. Ha ha ha! I feed on your anger and frustration! And now I will eat like a king! Dilbert: Good luck with that. I've been dead on the inside since the teamwork seminar. Mordac: Sheesh. I'm living on goldfish crackers.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #mergers & acquisitions, #redendancy, #hard work, #fired, #card board boxes

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, the merger has made your job redundant. As a reward for your years of hard work, feel free to use one of our cardboard boxes to get your junk out of here. Uh-oh. It looks like we forgot to hide the good boxes.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gadgets, #pizza, #mens room, #ipad, #newspaper, #pizza delivery, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Have you seen Wally? Dilbert: He's been in the men's room for two days. He used to leave when he was done reading the paper, but he switched to an iPad and now he doesn't know when he's finished. Alice: He has to come out to eat. Pizza Guy: I have a pizza for the third stall.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #business card, #no @ sign, #email, #missing number, #phone number

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally : Mere's my card. Let me know if I can be of further assistance. Coworker: Your phone number is missing a digit and your email address doesn't have an @ symbol. Wally: I didn't say it would be easy.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #motivation, #insincere, #bar too high, #low motivation, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My motivation is low today. I understand it's your job to fix that situation. An insincere attaboy or a fake interest in my life would be enough. Boss: Drop dead and let the flies eat you. Dilbert: I set the bar too high again.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fear, #surprise, #underwear, #interruption, #sphicter, #scared, #shitless

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Alice, do you have a... Alice: Gaaa!!! My day has been one interruption after another! Coworker: You made my sphincter eat my underpants! Alice: Yeah, I do that now.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #civil disobedience, #elbonian embassy, #card table, #asylum, #embacile, #clever

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert; I'm looking for the Elbonian embassy. Elbonian: You found it. It's just me and this card table. If you need asylum, pull up a chair. Dilbert: Has anyone ever called you and "embacile?" Elbonian: That's clever. I like it.