Ask Comic Strips - Page 23
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Character
413 Results for Ask
View 221 - 230 results for ask comic strips. Discover the best "Ask" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 28,
2007
Wednesday March 07,
2007
Wednesday February 28,
2007
Tags asbestos, ceiling, danger, telekinesis, neutralized, never ask, curious
Transcript
Wally: They found asbestos in our ceiling. We're all in danger. Asok: "I must use my telekinesis to remove the asbestos." "GAAA!" The threat has been neutralized. You must never ask me how it was done." Wally: I'm not even curious."
Tuesday February 13,
2007
Tags violating personal space, head stuck, ear canal, doctor, baffled, medical
Transcript
Dilbert: He was violating my personal space and his head got stuck in my ear." "You need a huge yawn to open the ear canal so he can get out." Tina: Yes, I do have lots of pictures of my porcelain frog collection. Why do you ask?"
Monday January 22,
2007
Tags evil director, human resources, scientist, planet zorp, technolgies, engineers, transfer knowledge, work, fabric covered container, business, science
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Scientist: I am a scientist from the planet Zorp. I bring you technologies beyond your imagination. All I ask is that you let me work with your engineers to transfer this knowledge. They think 'work' means sitting in a fabric-covered container.
Tuesday January 09,
2007
Tags heals itself, sales engineer, sales rep, totally true, truth vs.lies, questions
Transcript
Sales Engineer "Your sales rep told us that the product heals itself. Is that true?" Dilbert: It's totally true...that he said that. sales engineer: Let me ask this another way... Dilbert: NOOO!!! One way per question!"
Friday January 05,
2007
Tags amortize the depreciation, energency hoagie, quality of decions, too hungry, quality of decisons, hunger pangs, effect thinking
Transcript
My diet is making me too hungry to listen. I hope that doesn't affect the quality of my decisions. "Amortize the depreciation over the bandwidth of the discount rate." "Don't ask him for anything today." "I brought an emergency hoagie."
Sunday December 31,
2006
Transcript
I'll ask the vendor for ballpark prices to see if the idea is feasible. "You can't talk with vendors until our change control board approves the project." "But that would require a cost-benefit analysis." "And I can't do that without ballpark prices from the vendor." "Just take your best guess." "So...I should make up a number so I can get approval to make a phone call and ask what the number should have been?" "Right. But first you need to get my approval to do the cost-benefit analysis." "Will you approve it?" "I'd have to see the numbers."
Saturday December 30,
2006
Sunday December 24,
2006
Transcript
"I'll be right back after I return these dishes to the cafeteria." "Whoa, whoa!" "Winners don't return dishes to the cafeteria." "Then how do the dishes get back?" "You must use your power of low standards." "Just place the dishes on the floor and wait for a loser with high standards." "Gaaa! Dishes on the floor!" "Once again I have to clean up after slobs!" "It is like a miracle." "Now ask her to bring you back a yogurt."


