Idea Comic Strips - Page 23
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333 Results for Idea
View 221 - 230 results for idea comic strips. Discover the best "Idea" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday June 06,
2005
Tags beta version, archive option, way you ask, try yelling
Transcript
The Boss: The beta version looks great. Now ask if they'll tss in an archive option for no extra money. Dilbert: "That's a great idea. Or...maybe I could save time by the realizing that they aren't raging morons who enjoy working for free." The boss: "It's all in the way you ask." Dilbert: "I'll try yelling."
Saturday May 21,
2005
Tags leadership succession plan, freeze hiring, staff, pormotion, bad idea
Transcript
Catbert: "You have to have a leadership succession plan." "There's a freeze on hiring, so you'll have to pick someone from your staff." Alice: "So, if something horrible happened to you, I'd get a promotion?" The boss: "This was a bad idea."
Tuesday May 17,
2005
Tags dilbert.com, owls for fuel, new suv, good idea, start breeding owls
Transcript
The Boss: My new SUV uses owls for fuel. It seemed like a good idea but now I can't find enough owls. Carol: "You'll have to start your own owls." The boss: "That's what I figured." The Hilarious conclusion to this comic has been deemed offensive, If you must know how it ends, go to dilbert.com
Sunday November 14,
2004
Tags banned, cell phones with cae, copied, digital form, emailed anywhere, evil director, excellent idea, new cell ohone, rendered useless, scanned, scrap book
Transcript
"Catbert: evil director of human resources" "Excellent idea." "Cell phones with cameras are banned from the workplace." "Why?" "We don't want you taking pictures of proprietary information." "Most of our information is in digital form and can be e-mailed anywhere." "The rest is on paper that can be copied, scanned or tucked down one's trousers." "My new cell phone will be rendered useless for no good reason!" "And you aren't even banning regular cameras!!" This one goes in the scrapbook." "Snap"
Monday November 08,
2004
Tags consultation, enbrace idea, frees your mid, profitable products, ultra donut, 40 thousand calories, sharp objects
Transcript
Dogbert consults Dogbert: Once you embrace the idea that your customers deserve to die... ...it frees your mind to invent splendidly profitable products. Its called the ultra - donut: forty thousand calories and filled with sharp objects.
Monday August 16,
2004
Tags meeting, improve communication, imitates boss, business
Transcript
Man: I called this meeting so I could tell you the division's goals for next year. Alice: Thats a good idea because we're all so dumb that we coldly possibly read this in email. Goal one: Improve communication. ALiceL I can't. Im too dumb.
Sunday June 20,
2004
Tags absorb project, zombie employee, flakey, wide eyed, not helpful
Transcript
The boss: Dilbert, you'll absorb bills project when he transfers. Dont worry, He'll tell you everything you need to know. The whatchamacallit has to be whatever or else the who sits will go hey hey. Now this is either the budget total or a fax number. Its absolutely critical that you....um...I lost my train of thought. Dilbert: do you have a list of key contacts? That would have been a good idea. Dilbert: Can I call you if I have questions? You can try. I love my coworkers, until they talk.
Wednesday May 26,
2004
Tags kodos, morale, mascot, meetings, moral improves, bear suit, meeting, low morale, idea for imprvement, business
Transcript
The Boss: "His name is Kudos, the bear-er of good morale!" "Kudos" "He's our new mascot. He'll attend all of our meetings until morale improves." "Today is Asok's turn in the suit."
Monday May 10,
2004
Tags vogue, madonna, hug liar, gandhi, dancing, lunch table
Transcript
"So I was dancing with Madonna and went "Vogue" like this. She liked the idea and made a video." "You've either had a fascinating life or you're a huge liar. I'm still undecided." "Ghandi said the same thing. SO I said, 'I'm not eating until you take it back.'"
Friday April 30,
2004
Tags least popular feature, generate revenue, save money, steal idea
Transcript
Dilbert: I recommend that we eliminate the least popular features because they cost us more than they generate in revenue. The Boss: I have an idea. Lets laminate the least popular features to save money. Dilbert: I suggest that we eliminate the least popular features . The Boss: I steal that idea to infinity.


