Read Books Comic Strips - Page 23
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231 Results for Read Books
View 221 - 230 results for read books comic strips. Discover the best "Read Books" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 19,
2019
Did You Get My Email
Tags business, email, managers & supervisors, office, talking
Transcript
the boss: did you read my email? dilbert: yes. dilbert: are you aware that email is a substitute for talking in person? the boss thinking: i thought i heard something about that.
Wednesday July 10,
2019
Ai That Creates Comics
Tags Comic Strip, inventions, sarcasm, technology, creativity
Transcript
Dilbert: I invented an A.I. that can create comic strips. Boss: Pffft! That's impossible. No machine will ever match the creative genius of human cartoonists. Dilbert: This one is about a guy who thinks his boss is dumb. Boss: No one wants to read that.
Wednesday October 09,
2019
Your Real Scheme
Tags office workers, office, business, scheme, power, costs, mind, reader, psychology
Transcript
dilbert: and this method will reduce costs by thirty percent. ted: nice try, but i know your real scheme is to grab power. dilbert: you're not a good mind reader ted: and yet i knew you would say i can't read minds, explain that
Monday December 02,
2019
Tina Enters Coma
Tags office workers, business, technology, write, body, language, read
Transcript
tina the tech writer tina: in simple terms, tell me how the technology works, so i can write about it. one hour later dilbert pointing to flow chart: and that's how it all...uh-oh. if i am reading your body language correctly, you're saying i could have shortened that. continued...
Thursday January 09,
2020
Mind Reading
Tags business, judge, ruling, gavel, proof, thoughts, unfair, mind, reading
Transcript
court of stupidity judge with gavel: the court rules that dilbert should magically know what his boss wants at all times. dilbert: i'm not a mind-reader! judge: prove it! dilbert: how can i prove i can't read minds? judge: easy. tell me what i'm not thinking.
Monday January 27,
2020
Mind Reader
Tags business, plan, sabotage, mind reader, success, apology
Transcript
dilbert: i don't think your plan will work. employee: pffft. of course you don't. you are trying to sabotage me because you are jealous of my success. dilbert: you read minds as well as you make plans. employee: apology accepted.
Friday January 31,
2020
What Good Is Money
Tags business, sarcasm, income, soul, money, earn, rent, own
Transcript
dilbert on couch at home: what good is earning money if it costs me my soul? dogbert: well, for one thing, it's the only way you can pay your rent. dilbert: rent? i own this house. dogbert: you really should read the things i ask you to docusign.
Thursday March 12,
2020
Selling Private Data
Tags business, job, management, cloud, data, people, private, information, laugh, market, sell, email, friend
Transcript
dogbert: the only reason i took a job managing cloud data is so i could laugh at people's private information. dogbert: then i discovered a robust market for selling that kind of stuff, so it's a twofer. dilbert: we need to talk. dogbert: sure. just email your thoughts to a friend, and i'll probably read them.
Tuesday April 07,
2020
Three Dogberts
Tags business, Dogbert, marketing, plan, clone, singularity, event, book
Transcript
dogbert on desk with three dogberts behind him: i've got three dogberts working on your marketing plan, but even that isn't enough. i'd bump it up to five dogcarts, but then we risk creating a singularity event. boss: i don't get it. dogbert: read a book.
Monday July 20,
2020
Dilbert Wants To Write Book
Tags book, boring, colon, elephant, exercise, interesting, people, sarcasm, speaking, technology, write
Transcript
dilbert and dogbert wearing face masks on a walk. dilbert: i'm thinking about writing a book. dogbert: can boring people write interesting books? dilbert: maybe i write better than i speak. dogbert: sure, and maybe an elephant lives in my colon.