2020 Comic Strips - Page 24
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Character
Friday August 14,
2020
Can't Let It Go
Tags business, face mask, let it go, office workers, software, technology, test
Transcript
co-worker: i thought you said we would be testing the software by today. dilbert: nope. i never said anything remotely like that. co-worker: i can't let this go. dilbert: i didn't think you could.
Saturday August 15,
2020
Ted Needed To Know
Tags office workers, technology, business, email, forward, malice, slander, private, know, face maks
Transcript
alice: i forwarded your email to ted. Dilbert shaken: WHAT!!! i said bad things about ted! that was a private email to you! alice: he needed to know. dilbert yelling: he did not need to know!
Monday August 17,
2020
It Is A Burden To Know You
Tags business, office workers, technology, video, assignment, homework, helpful, enemies
Transcript
co-worker: did you watch the video i sent? dilbert: it's a burden to know you because you keep assigning me homework. co-worker: i'm trying to be helpful. dilbert: can you help my enemies instead?
Tuesday August 18,
2020
Social Media Poisoning
Tags health, medical, doctor, social media, poison, defensive, angry, self-control, weight, pounds, shaming, fat, over reaction
Transcript
dilbert in doctor's office. dilbert: i think i have social media poisoning. it makes me feel defensive and angry all the time, but i can't quit. doctor: you've gained five pounds. dilbert yelling: you fat-shaming quack!
Wednesday August 19,
2020
Dilbert Is Sexist
Tags insult, managers & supervisors, office workers, fire, crazy, gender, true, false, anger, face mask
Transcript
tina: i want you to fire dilbert because he said i might be nuts. he wouldn't say that to a man. boss: he said the same thing to me last week. tina yelling: it doesn't count if it's true!
Thursday August 20,
2020
Study 5 G First
Tags managers & supervisors, technology, business, 5g, dangerous, study, research, reporter
Transcript
boss: dilbert, i need you to respond to this reporter who thinks our 5g technology is dangerous. dilbert: is it dangerous? boss: how would i know? dilbert: maybe i should study it first. boss: never mind. i'll ask someone else.
Friday August 21,
2020
5 G Gives You A Bird Head
Tags business, technology, social media, bird head, study, apathy, 5g
Transcript
dilbert: according to people on social media, our 5g technology will "give you a bird head." maybe we should study it a bit more. wally: nah, i'd wait until we see a beak.
Saturday August 22,
2020
5 G Doorway To The Demon World
Tags 5g, accident, business, demon, public, spook, technology, world
Transcript
dilbert: our 5g test accidentally opened a doorway to the demon world. boss: let's keep that to ourselves so we don't spook the public. dilbert: don't tell me. tell daryll. green demon standing behind boss: hey, nice world you have here.
Sunday September 13,
2020
Applying Math To Guesses
Tags business ethics, managers & supervisors, employment, business, analysis, discount rate, installation, maintenance, project, technology, math, guess, sarcasm, face mask
Transcript
boss: how confident are you in your analysis? dilbert: very confident. boss: good. dilbert: unless i used the wrong discount rate, which is hard to know. boss: but otherwise, it's solid? dilbert: except for the installation and maintenance costs, which are wild guesses. and we don't know if we sized the project right, so costs could be double or triple. boss: it sounds as if you applied math to a bunch of wild guesses. dilbert: yes, but i got the result you wanted. boss: next time, just say that.
Sunday September 20,
2020
Silencer In Facemask
Tags bored, business, covid, face mask, hear, managers & supervisors, office workers, play, silencer, talk
Transcript
wally: i installed a silencer in our pointy-haired boss's face mask. now he's the only one who can hear himself talk, but he doesn't know it. here he comes. play along. boss has speech bubble with no words. boss's back is turned and has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh. okay. thanks. and i can do the same thing to the face mask of anyone else who bores me. dilbert has speech bubble with no words. wally: uh-huh.

