Change Subject Comic Strips - Page 24

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284 Results for Change Subject

View 231 - 240 results for change subject comic strips. Discover the best "Change Subject" comics from Dilbert.com.

Bad Negotiator

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Bad Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temperature, #disagreement, #negotiation, #compromise, #thermostat

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Alice: It's freezing in here. Dilbert: I'm hot. Put on a sweater. Alice: Why am I the one who has to change? You should wear a sweater made of ice packs. Dilbert: It's time to admit I'm a bad negotiator.

Just A Guy In A Box

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Just A Guy In A Box - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #existentialism, #existence, #value, #work, #use, #useful, #change

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Dilbert: I like to think the work I'm doing here will change the world. Boss: Your project didn't get funded because Carol forgot to put a meeting on my calendar. Dilbert: There is, however, a non-zero chance that I"m just a guy sitting in a box.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managing, #work ethic, #laziness, #deception, #trick

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Boss: IS the software done yet? Wally: That depends. Do you have any new feature requests? Boss: Only three. Wally: Then it's not done, is it? Boss: Well, no, I guess not. So... when will it be done? Wally: It will be done one week after you give me your last changes. But I believe you taught us that change is good. So either you can be a stagnant bureaucrat or a dynamic leader with lots of changes. It's a question of free will, really. Boss: I have to be somewhere else.

Change To Bad Design

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Change To Bad Design - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #link, #traffic, #design, #color, #Opinion, #obliviousness

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Boss: Can you make that link button blue instead of burnt orange? Dilbert: Yes, if you want people to click on it, and you thrive on bad design. Boss: I have an eye for design. Dilbert: And I have an elbow for music.

Political Opinions Only Make It Worse

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Political Opinions Only Make It Worse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #intelligence, #speaking, #conversation, #Politics

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Man: Did you watch any of the debates? Dilbert: Stop right there. I'm barely clinging to the illusion that you're competent at your job. Don't talk about politics or it will only get worse. Man: Did you know China caused climate change by hogging the sun? Dilbert: And there it is.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #logic, #no-win, #deadline

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Wally: Are these user specifications complete? I ask because any later changes will cause me to miss the deadline. Man: What if I only need a tiny change later? Wally: I'm counting on it. That way I can blame you when I miss the deadline. Man: How do most people handle this situation? Wally: Well, the pessimists know they're doomed, so it's no surprise to them when it happens. Man: What do the optimists do? Wally: They become pessimists.

Requesting The Slightest Change

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Requesting The Slightest Change - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #web, #internet, #site, #code, #coding, #development, #deadline, #delay, #time, #technology

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Boss: Will our new website be live this week? Developer: That depends. If you request even the slightest change, it could set things back for months. Boss: I only want to change the homepage title font. Developer: Oh, great. I should be done by next summer.

Estimating Finish Times

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Estimating Finish Times - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #website, #internet, #developer, #code, #coding, #deadline, #time, #deception, #lying, #technology

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Boss: I'm having trouble managing our web developer because I don't know how long things are supposed to take. Does it really take nine months to change the font on the home page? Developer: How much do I owe you? Dilbert: Tell him my project normally takes two years.

Ceo Fixes His Problem

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Ceo Fixes His Problem - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #product safety, #danger, #battery, #recall, #cell phone, #samsung, #media, #Entertainment, #technology

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CEO: The press says I need to resign because of our exploding phones fiasco. Dilbert: Maybe you can change their minds by sending the press our new model that doesn't explode. CEO: I already sent them the exploding phones and said it was our new models. Your way left too much to chance.

Bad Optics

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Bad Optics - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #appearances, #optics, #logic, #deception

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Boss: I don't like the optics of your plan. Dilbert: It's the only plan that can work. Should I change it to something that looks good but won't work? Boss: Excellent idea. You might have more management potential than I though.