Personal Space Comic Strips - Page 24

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271 Results for Personal Space

View 231 - 240 results for personal space comic strips. Discover the best "Personal Space" comics from Dilbert.com.

What The Boss Said

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What The Boss Said - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags secret, accusation, privacy, following, bathroom, restroom, personal space

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Ted: I think you know something about my project and your boss told you to keep quiet. Ha! You just confirmed it by avoiding eye contact! Dilbert: Maybe you could get your own stall? Ted: Why? What do you have to hide?

Entitled Employee Buys A Car

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Entitled Employee Buys A Car - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags entitled, entitlement, millennials, work ethic, lazy, consumerism

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The Entitled Employee. Man: I need a raise because I bought a luxury car. Boss: Your pay is based on your performance, not your personal expenses. Man: You leave me no choice but to keep the car and not pay for it. Boss: Tell them you deserve it.

Boss Gets A Nickname

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Boss Gets A Nickname - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags scientist, nickname, obliviousness, stephen hawking, black holes, space, science

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Wally: Our new nickname for you is based on the work of Stephen Hawking. Hawking is one of the greatest scientific minds of our time. Boss: I like it! Dilbert: I need him to make a decision today. Carol: Toss it in the black hole.

Wally And The Lactation Room

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Wally And The Lactation Room - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags man cave, coffee, trick, lactation room

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Boss: Someone turned our lactation room into a personal man cave. Wally: That guy sounds awesome. Boss: The janitor found a recliner, a tv,and a coffee maker in there. So I asked myself who would put a coffee maker in a lactation room. Wally: I drink mine black.

Bribing Wally

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Bribing Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bribe, morals, laziness, work ethic

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Wally: I don't have time to help. Coworker: What if I bribe you to do your job? I am literally offering to give you my personal money to do the job your employer pays you to do. Wally: Are you willing to turn a blind eye to my total lack of effort, or should I find a better briber?

Volunteers For Mars Trip

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Volunteers For Mars Trip - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags space, astronaut, engineering, karma, death, design, medical

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Boss: I need volunteers to go to Mars in the spaceship we're building. Dilbert: Ask Ted. He's dispensable because he's a terrible engineer. Boss: Ted designed the spaceship. Dilbert: Karma will sort that all out.

Naming The Spaceship

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Naming The Spaceship - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags naming, space, space flight, rocket, engineering, failure, death, medical

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Ted: I'm looking for a name for the spaceship that I designed. Dilbert: How about "Death Tube?" Alice: "Space Debris?" Wally: "Final Resting Place?" Ted: I was hoping for something more positive. Voice: We're positive it will explode.

Picking The Spaceship Staff

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Picking The Spaceship Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags space, space flight, rocket, death, sacrifice, astronaut, medical

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CEO: How's the Mars spaceship project going? Boss: Good. I picked our worst employees to be on the first test flight, just in case it explodes. CEO: Good thinking. Boss: We have two ways to win and no way to lose.

Oxygen Not In The Budget

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Oxygen Not In The Budget - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags space flight, astronaut, oxygen, breathing, leadership, obliviousness

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Boss: I'm happy to announce that we launched our company's spaceship to Mars. We only had enough in the budget to give them oxygen for three-quarters of the trip. So I told them to breathe smarter, not harder. It's called leadership.

Boss Doesn't See Email

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Boss Doesn't See Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags space, astronaut, engineering, laziness, bureaucracy, accident

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Boss: The crew of our first spaceship suffocated on the launchpad. Apparently, I got an email last week asking for approval to repair the oxygen generator. Carol: You killed them with your incompetence? Boss: I can't take all the credit. It was a team effort.