Wally Comic Strips - Page 24
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Character
1000 Results for Wally
View 231 - 240 results for Wally comic strips. Discover the best "Wally" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday August 13,
2018
Shred The Copies
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday August 07,
2018
Wally Enjoys Listening To Himself
Sunday August 05,
2018
Tags the boss, Wally, goals, employees, accomplishing
Transcript
The Boss: Did you achieve your goals this quarter? Wally: I sure did! Best quarter ever! The Boss: Really? I wasn't expecting that. Wally: What kind of manager has no faith in his employees? You need to trust me to do what needs to be done. The Boss: Um, okay, so... Which goals did you accomplish? Wally: You also need to trust your employees when they say they accomplished their goals. The Boss: I think I see where this is going. Wally: I was hoping you wouldn't.
Thursday August 02,
2018
Coffee Machine Uses Guilt
Tags Wally, alice, Dilbert, coffee, coffee maker, automatic, invention, manipulation
Transcript
Dilbert: I added artificial intelligence to our coffee maker. Now it uses guilt to manipulate people into making a fresh pot if they take the last cup. Coffee Maker: You disgust me. Wally: I get that a lot.
Saturday July 28,
2018
Haircut On Company Times
Tags hair, haircut, time, break
Transcript
Boss: Wally, do you have a minute? Wally: No. I have to get a haircut. Boss: You can't get a haircut on company time. Wally: I'm only cutting the hairs that grew on company time. Boss: How do you know which ones grew on company time? Wally: It's always hairs three and five.
Thursday July 19,
2018
Death By Ninjas Is Best
Tags ninja, hit man, optimism, frustration, irony
Transcript
Wally: Why aren't you worried about the Elbonian ninjas who are reportedly coming here to kill you in your sleep? Dilbert: That's the best way to die. I won't care about anything after I'm gone, so this is the ideal scenario for me. Elbonian 1: He's ruining everything with his cheery attitude. Elbonian 2: Let's see how he likes another thirty years in a cubicle.
Saturday July 07,
2018
Can't Remember Wally's Project
Tags language, jargon, obliviousness, bluff, managers
Transcript
Boss: I can't remember what project you're working on. Wally: I'm integrating parallel platforms for load balancing across incremental networks. Boss: Keep doing that. I can never tell when I'm having a good day.
Saturday June 30,
2018
No Path To Victory
Friday June 29,
2018
Might Reorganize
Tags responsibility, work ethic, reorganization, merger, laziness
Transcript
Wally: Are you still considering a reorganization of the department? Boss: Maybe. Wally: Oh, good. I was worried I might be held accountable for my lack of accomplishments. Boss: I might be playing this wrong. Wally: Hey, everyone! We're free!
Wednesday June 27,
2018
Ai For Productivity
Tags meetings, meeting, productivity, obliviousness, business
Transcript
Boss: We started using A.I. to identify when employees are unproductive. Device: Ping ping ping ping ping ping. Boss: Looks like this meeting is setting off some alarms.

