Dominant Internet Source Comic Strips - Page 24

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

242 Results for Dominant Internet Source

View 231 - 240 results for dominant internet source comic strips. Discover the best "Dominant Internet Source" comics from Dilbert.com.

Estimating Finish Times

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Estimating Finish Times - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #website, #internet, #developer, #code, #coding, #deadline, #time, #deception, #lying, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm having trouble managing our web developer because I don't know how long things are supposed to take. Does it really take nine months to change the font on the home page? Developer: How much do I owe you? Dilbert: Tell him my project normally takes two years.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #cognition, #distraction, #Entertainment, #mindless, #cell phone, #internet, #social media

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I wanted to be productive this week but the big tech companies didn't let me. Boss: That's ridiculous. They can't stop people from doing work. Dilbert: Actually, they can. Their business models depend on interrupting users with ads, and apps, and mindless entertainment. Until recently, humans could resist these distractions. But now the tech companies are using science to make their apps addictive. They learned how to hijack our brains. What started as simple entertainment evolved into military-grade mind control. Did you hear any of that? Boss: Any of what?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rumor, #conjecture, #karma, #payback

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I heard that you think I'm making the wrong decision with our technology roadmap. Dilbert: I never said that. Boss: I heard you did. Dilbert: Who told you that? Boss: I promised I wouldn't reveal my source. Dilbert: It never happened. Boss: That's not what I hear. Dilbert: Will the fate of my entire career depend on that rumor? Boss: It already does. Dilbert: Do you ever worry about karma? Boss: Get back to work. Narrator: One hour later. CEO: I hear you're embezzling like crazy. Boss: Who told you that?

Dilbert Might Have Lied

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Might Have Lied - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rumors, #sources, #journalism, #accusation

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I heard you lied about moving the server rack. Dilbert: It isn't true. Man: I heard it from several sources. Dilbert: Each of them heard it from the same source, who was wrong. Man: With that much smoke, there must be a fire. Dilbert: Yes, but it's coming out of your ears.

Boss Is Not A Quitter

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Is Not A Quitter  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #social media, #internet, #troll, #trolling, #baiting, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: That stupid online troll is insulting me again on social media! I keep defending myself, but instead of agreeing with me, he keeps calling me "defensive" and "pathetic," Carol: Maybe you could stop engaging with him. Boss: I'm not a quitter!

Need A Dopamine Hit

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Need A Dopamine Hit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #addiction, #technology, #stimulation, #dopamine, #distraction, #cell phone, #social media, #Games, #internet

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My digital devices have reduced my attention span so much I can barely concentrate on work. I need a dopamine hit every four seconds or I look for something else to do. Carol: Would you mind terribly if I play with my phone while you drone on and on?

He Didn't Deny It

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
He Didn't Deny It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rumor, #conspiracy, #sources, #vetting, #accusation, #guilt, #innocence

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: How conspiracy theories happen. Catbert: I've heard from multiple sources that you deleted Alice's files on the server. Dilbert: Your multiple sources all heard it from Alice. That is only one source. Catbert: He didn't deny it. Narrator: Continued...

Changing The Website

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Changing The Website - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #business, #internet & world wide web, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We need to change one of the links on our website. Boss: Pull together a study team, do a focus group, get buy-in from all departments, and present it at the next division meeting. Dilbert: I changed it while you were yammering. Boss: Let us never speak of this again.

No Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #complaining, #engineering, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The network will be down all day, but try to do what you can without it. Dilbert: What can we do without it besides drink coffee, complain, and whittle? Boss: No knives at work. Dilbert: Hold off on the whittling.

Humans And Parakeets

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Humans And Parakeets - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #carol, #research, #humans, #parakeets, #offspring, #blog, #deny

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I was doing some research on the internet and learned that humans and parakeets can mate and produce offspring. Carol: I don't believe that. Boss: It's true. I read about it on a blog. Carol: I wouldn't call that "research". Boss: Deny science much?