No Budget Comic Strips - Page 24

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

303 Results for No Budget

View 231 - 240 results for no budget comic strips. Discover the best "No Budget" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ceo placements, magic 8 ball, performed better, dogbert the headhunter

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dogbert the Headhunter. Dogbert says to a client, "Let me tell you how good my CEO placements have been." Dogbert continues, "An astonishing fifty percent of them have performed better than the other half!" Dogbert continues, "If you're on a budget, I recommend one of our stuffed CEO units with a 'Magic 8 Ball' head."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new ad campiagn, music from artsits, willing to sell out, dead musicians, not descomposed

View Transcript

Transcript

Our new as caiman willies familiar music from artists who are willing to sell out. Due to budget cuts, we'll limit our search to musicians who are dead but not yet totally decomposed. MAKEUP!!!!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags office relocation., new cubicle, less roomy, need butter, torso, slide in, attracts rats, cheap, low budget

View Transcript

Transcript

Office relocation. Asok: Your new cubicle is less roomy than the old one. You will need this butter. Apply it liberally to your torso area and you can slide right in. But don't stay in there for more than 10 minutes at a time because it attracts rats.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags no budeget, give raisem, business trip las vegas, four million, bathrub, flooded five floors, bartenders

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "Don't blame me, but there's no budget to give you a raise this year." Alice: "Why not?" The boss: "My business trip to Las Vegas cost four million dollars because I passed out in the bathtub with the water running and flooded five floors." The boss; "The bartenders there are totally irresponsible."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags less money, use bydget, flexible, approving expenses

View Transcript

Transcript

"I need to use up my budget before the end of the year or else I'll get less next year." "So I'll be flexible about approving expenses for a few days. Wink, wink." "Nice coffee-holding panda." "You should see the one that isn't pregnant."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags finance troll, not in budeget, eats employee, prototype

View Transcript

Transcript

"And then we'll build a second prototype and..." "IT'S NOT IN THE BUDGET." "Oh, suddenly it's my fault for caring about the budget."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags written in stone, actual stone, stone tablet

View Transcript

Transcript

We're supposed to have our budget approved by Tuesday but that's not written in stone. "Yes it is. I have it right here." "It was kind of lucky because this is the only one I brought to the meeting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags outsourcing, design, communication, miscommunication, manufacturing, obliviousness, marketing, business

View Transcript

Transcript

We ship our new mp3 player in two days. How's the Elbonian factory coming along? "The prototype is the size of a small tractor and it will only play Elbonian polkas." "I'll budget a little extra for marketing." "It's made of asbestos."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Alice, our budget is tight so I've been asked to reward you with non-monetary compensation." "Do you know Ken in marketing? You can punch him as hard as you want." "Does Ken know about this?" "People love surprises."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Today I will keep a positive attitude about life. "I canceled your project so I can use the budget to remodel my office." "Yay life!"