2018 Comic Strips - Page 25

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Wally Mentors To Death

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Wally Mentors To Death - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags asok, Wally, successful, definition, minimum, alive, employed, comas, ruling

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Asok: Have you ever mentored anyone who went on to be successful? Wally: Depends on your definition of success. Asok: Well, at minimum, they'd need to be alive and gainfully employed. Wally: What's your ruling on comas?

Wally's Track Record As Mentor

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Wally's Track Record As Mentor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags abuse, Wally, Dilbert, coffee, self-inflicted, injuries, interns

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Wally: I checked up on all of the interns I've mentored over the years. Most of them died from self-inflicted inures. Dilbert: And the rest? Wally: The rest were killed by other people.

Dogbert's Time Management Book

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Dogbert's Time Management Book - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, time, management, time management, blank

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Dogbert: Would you like to read my book on time management? Dilbert: Yes. These pages are blank. Dogbert: I just saved you three hours.

Unmotivated Staff

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Unmotivated Staff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Catbert, the boss, wrong, leadership, skills

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The Boss: A few months ago, I realized my staff was unmotivated and working on all the wrong things. It took all of my leadership skills to get them motivated again. Catbert: Are they still doing the wrong things? The Boss: Faster than ever.

Introducing The New Hire

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Introducing The New Hire - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, new hire, names, introduction

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The New Hire New Hire: Can you take me around the office and introduce me? The Boss: No, that scheme won't work because it requires me to admit I don't know most of their names. New Hire: What's my name? The Boss: Um... Does it start with a letter?

Glass Is Half Full

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Glass Is Half Full - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, the boss, glass, half empty, half full, the engineer, pie hole

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The Boss: A pessimist says the glass is half empty. An optimist says it is half full. Dilbert: The engineer says the glass is too big. The Boss: The manager says the engineer should shut his pie hole.

Ted Dies From Chair

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Ted Dies From Chair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Catbert, the boss, ted, treadmill, alice, exercise ball, kneeling chair, ergonomics

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Catbert: Ted got thrown from his treadmill desk, bounced off of alice's exercise ball chair, and broke his neck on a kneeling chair. The cause of death is listed as, "good ergonomics." On the plus side, his posture was excellent.

Radical Candor

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Radical Candor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, Dilbert, management, radical condor, time, computer

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The Boss: I've decided to adopt a hot new management trend called, "Radical Condor." The trick is to be direct yet kind at the same time. Dilbert: What were you doing before? The Boss: Let's not get into that.

Candor Monster

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Candor Monster - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, carol, radical candor, therapy, criticism, monster

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The Boss: My new system of using "radical candor," is working out great. I've been criticizing people all morning and only three of them went into therapy over it. Now I turn my candor to you. Carol: Die, monster!

Carol Gets Some Candor

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Carol Gets Some Candor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags carol, Wally, radical candor, candor, compliment, deer, scat, forest, fire

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Wally: Looks like you got a good dose of radical candor. Carol: Yes, but it can bundled with insincere kindness, so all I felt was some tingling. Wally: You look like deer scat after a forest fire. Carol: Thank you for your candor.