Sit Down Comic Strips - Page 25
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1000 Results for Sit Down
View 241 - 250 results for sit down comic strips. Discover the best "Sit Down" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 18,
2004
Tags submit, resume, misguided optimism, human will see resume, email parents
Transcript
Click Submit" to post your resume on the jobs web site." "Now sit back and enjoy the misguided optimism that someday a human being will see it." "Be sure to tell your parents that you looked for a job today." "I'll e-mail them."
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday December 14,
2004
Tags stock guy, conflicts of interest, knocked out, fist down throat, violence, crime
Transcript
Alice: I didn't like the way he was looking at me. The Boss: "This isn't good." "He was the only stock analyst who had a "buy" recommendation on our company." Alice: "I think we're a "hold" now." The Boss: "Where will we find another one with so much conflict of interest??!"
Monday December 13,
2004
Tags death, down throat fist, eat, mouth, punches, ram fist grab pants, stock analysts, stranger, threatens coworker, boss unfazed, violence, medical
Transcript
Alice: I odnt know who you are, but I odnt like all of the questions you're asking. Im going to ram my fist down your throat , grab your pants and turn you inside out. Alice: eat, death stranger! The Boss: I see you've met our stock analyst,
Sunday November 14,
2004
Tags banned, cell phones with cae, copied, digital form, emailed anywhere, evil director, excellent idea, new cell ohone, rendered useless, scanned, scrap book
Transcript
"Catbert: evil director of human resources" "Excellent idea." "Cell phones with cameras are banned from the workplace." "Why?" "We don't want you taking pictures of proprietary information." "Most of our information is in digital form and can be e-mailed anywhere." "The rest is on paper that can be copied, scanned or tucked down one's trousers." "My new cell phone will be rendered useless for no good reason!" "And you aren't even banning regular cameras!!" This one goes in the scrapbook." "Snap"
Friday August 13,
2004
Tags low pay, lowest paid, blame, no one left, aliens, illegal
Transcript
Tina: "I just saw a list of everyone's salary." "I thought the glass ceiling was holding me down, but you have the highest pay here." "There's no one left to blame for my low pay except... Ooh, wait... How about illegal aliens?"
Saturday July 17,
2004
Tags stock plunged, acquire compnay, few shares, sit in cubicle
Transcript
Dogbert: Your stock just plunged on the news that you're going to acquire another company. Have you noticed that your stock goes down whenever you do anything? I'll buy a few shares if you'll agree to sit motionlessly in your cubicle.
Thursday July 08,
2004
Tags more time, no shaving, all forms of hygiene, unwashed telecommunting, clown shoes, long toe nails
Transcript
"I save so much time by not shaving that Im considering giving up all forms of hygiene." "I'd phase into it by having a few unwashed telecommuting days per week." "And if you wear clown shoes, you never need to clip your toenails." "I should be writing this down."
Sunday April 04,
2004
Tags leadership meeting, no pen, no notes, no decison, no leadership
Transcript
CEO: This was a productive four hour leadership meeting, Id like one of you to type up your notes and send an email to the entire company. No one took notes? The Boss: I didn't have a pen. CEO: Okay no problem, does anyone remember what we decided? The Boss: We agreed to increase...something No, decrease something. CEO: Never mind. lets try it gain on thursday at 8AM Carol: When is the next leadership meeting? The Boss: I should have written that down.
Friday March 12,
2004
Tags 360 review, evil, judged, lazy, manipulative, no risk, quality of work, retribution
Transcript
"It's called a 360 degree review. You get to evaluate me at no risk of retribution." "No matter what you say about me, you will only be judged on the quality of your work." "Sometimes you are lazy, evil and manipulative." "The quality of your work just went way down."
Tuesday February 17,
2004
Tags pursue disruptive innovations.glorious, fully funded, amzing, free from bureaucracy, bean bag charis
Transcript
DOGBURT CONSULTS dogcart: "I recommend forming a separate group to pursue disruptive innovations." "It will be a glorious place: fully funded, amazing ambiance, brilliant people, free from bureaucracy." "Best of all, once a year they'll let you losers tour their work space and sit in their bean bag chairs."

