Hiring Engineers Comic Strips - Page 25

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

284 Results for Hiring Engineers

View 241 - 250 results for hiring engineers comic strips. Discover the best "Hiring Engineers" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally's Hobby Is Economic Babble Talk

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Hobby Is Economic Babble Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #jargon, #babble, #economics, #obliviousness, #economist, #economy, #hiring

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My new hobby is explaining economics using babble talk. It sounds totally real. For example, did you know that the bubble in commodities is creating an oversupply of interest rates? Meanwhile... Boss: Our Chief Economist quit. CEO: Promote that bald guy. He sounds smart.

Dilbert's App Evaluates Job Candidates

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert's App Evaluates Job Candidates - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #social interaction, #social media, #coders, #coding, #engineers, #friends, #work ethic, #social life, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented an app that evaluates job candidates based on their online footprint. Here's a guy with no friend, no hobbies, no family, and hundreds of high-quality code submissions to GitHub. Wait, that's me. Boss: Do you have any apps about other people?

Useless Mansplainers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Useless Mansplainers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mansplainer, #relations between the sexes, #sexism, #Women, #engineers, #programmers, #furstration

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I can't get any work done because my project team is a bunch of useless mansplainers. Why do men feel the need to explain things to me when I know more than they do? Boss: Let me explain it to you, Alice. Men like to show off and feel important. Alice: Stop it!

Dilbert And Alice Add Features

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert And Alice Add Features - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #inventions, #simplicity, #engineers, #complication, #complicated, #coffee, #mug, #overthinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Our boss asked me to totally ruin my double-handled coffee mug invention by adding features. I am asking each of you to suppress your engineering impulses just this one time and let this perfect product stay perfect. Dilbert: It would be perfect if it had wi-fi and a projection keyboard. Alice: Maybe add some health sensors and GPS.

Wally Not A Fan Of Implementation

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Not A Fan Of Implementation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #invention, #inventions, #design, #complication, #overthinking

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I asked the other engineers to help me develop my double-handed coffee mug invention. Now it is bloated with useless features and not dishwasher safe. Maybe you should cancel the project. Boss: Are you okay with that? Wally: I've never been a big fan of the implementation phase.

Smoking And Iq

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Smoking And Iq - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #smoking, #cigarettes, #tobacco, #intelligence, #i.q., #interview, #hiring

View Transcript

Transcript

Technical Interview. Dilbert: Do you smoke? Man: What does that have to do with my technical skills? Dilbert: A 2010 Israeli study says smokers have lower intelligence. Man: How do you know stuff like that? Dilbert: Would it be funny if I said I don't smoke?

Only Masochist Would Live Here

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Only Masochist Would Live Here - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hiring, #jobs, #talent, #masochist, #masochism, #expectations, #work ethic, #work environment

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Here's my list of the ten qualities I want in all new employees. Catbert: A person with all of these qualities would also need to be a masochist to work here. CEO: Write that in.

Ten Things We Look For In Employees

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ten Things We Look For In Employees - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hiring, #qualifications, #interview, #job interview, #outsmart

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We look for ten qualities when we hire. Man: Ten? I'm looking for an employer who knows how to set priorities. Boss: He was too good for us.

Alice Sets Precedent

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Sets Precedent - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #power, #exploitation, #frustration, #helpless, #mocking, #teasing, #cruelty

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I insulted our boss and he didn't react. The precedent has been set. I plan to test the limits of this unexpected employee benefit. What's up, idiot? Boss: Must... not... fire... good engineers.

Drones Attack Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Drones Attack Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineer, #engineers, #drone, #drones, #government contract, #contractor, #retaliation, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

G-Man 1: Oh-oh. The fugitive hacker Dilbert rolled down a hill and found a cell signal. G-Man 2: Relax. What can one engineer with a phone do against a superpower with armed drones? G-Man 1: Who do you think makes our drones???!!!