Managers & Supervisors Comic Strips - Page 25

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

469 Results for Managers & Supervisors

View 241 - 250 results for managers & supervisors comic strips. Discover the best "Managers & Supervisors" comics from Dilbert.com.

Self Reliant

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Self Reliant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, project, teamwork, help, teach, self-reliant

View Transcript

Transcript

boss to wally: ted says you wouldn't help him on his project. wally: i was teaching him how to be self-reliant. that's important too, isn't it? not such an easy question, is it?

Dilbert Gets A Mentor

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Gets A Mentor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, Advice, mentor, productivity, operations, vice president, pressure, trick

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i heard you asked our v.p. of operations to be your mentor. why didn't you tell me you needed some mentoring? i'm full of useful advice. dilbert: such as? boss: well... not you're putting me on the spot. it's hard to think of advice while you're pressuring me. maybe you could give me a scenario, and then i'll tell you what to do. dilbert: okay, suppose my boss is ruining my productivity by yammering about his great advice. what can i do? boss: that feels like a trick question. dilbert: our v.p. of operations could answer it.

We Already Have A Carl

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
We Already Have A Carl - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, interview, skills, confuse, employee, names

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i can't hire you because we already have an employee named carl. it would confuse people, and we don't need that. interviewee: what about my skills? boss: people with better names have skills too.

Two Places At Once

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Two Places At Once - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, meeting, time, states, impossible

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: you committed me to two different meetings at the same time in different states. it is not possible to be in two places at the same time wally: pfft! i could do it boss: even wally could do it

Multiple Choice

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Multiple Choice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags email, managers & supervisors, options, reply, business

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i sent you an email with three options, and you replied "yes" boss: i don't remember it. send it to me again dilbert: oookay email: which option do you prefer? boss types: yes

Dark Matter And Lights

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dark Matter And Lights - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, philosophy, world, dark, matter, light

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: did you know that 85% of the matter in the world is dark matter, and we don't even know what dark matter is? boss: i know what it is dilbert: you do? boss: it's when the lights are off. - duh. dilbert: i'm going to go talk to someone else now.

Imperfect Decisions

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Imperfect Decisions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, project, vacation, decision, uninformed, perfect, good, stupid, smart, enemy

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: while you were on vacation, we made some decisions about your project. dilbert: those would be uninformed decisions if you made them without me. boss: don't let perfect be the enemy of good dilbert: can i let stupid be the enemy of smart?

Learning What Doesn't Work

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Learning What Doesn't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, project, fail, failure, business

View Transcript

Transcript

wally in meeting: my project failed miserably, but i think we can agree we came out ahead. for example, we learned what does not work boss: you? wally: that's one way to look at it.

Wally Compared To A Placebo

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Compared To A Placebo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, project, failure, coincidence, placebo, insult

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: wally, i've noticed that every project you have worked on has failed. is that a coincidence? wally: it's hard to know. unless you compare me to a placebo. boss: okay, you're worse than a placebo. wally: i thought that would take longer.

Manufacturing In Elbonia

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Manufacturing In Elbonia - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, business, out source, elbonia, money, government, reputation

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: we're moving our manufacturing operations to elbonia to save money. dilbert: are you worried about elbonian government's reputation? boss: nah. i try to stay out of the weeds. dilbert: they're building concentration camps and rounding up dissenters. they intenionally poisoned a hundred thousand people in this country. they are habitual stealers of intellectual property, and they routinely ignore agreements they have signed. and they have a well-known goal of weakening other countries so they can dominate the world. boss: why can you just admit i'm saving money?