Promotion For Intern Comic Strips - Page 26

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

259 Results for Promotion For Intern

View 251 - 259 results for promotion for intern comic strips. Discover the best "Promotion For Intern" comics from Dilbert.com.

El Gato Leadership

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
El Gato Leadership - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #kissing up, #brown nosing, #delegate, #wisdom, #idiocy, #leadership

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Remember, intern, you can't spell delegate without some of the letters of "El Gato." Asok: Your saying is ridiculous and yet I find it compelling because it came from a leader. CEO: No, it is I who have learned the most from your ignorance. Asok: That is so wise!

Asok Approves

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok Approves - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #desperate, #desperation, #intern, #subordinate, #value, #importance

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I hear you need everyone's buy-in to proceed with your project. Dilbert: Everyone except you. No one cares what interns think. Asok: May I please approve it so I feel alive? Dilbert: Well... okay. But you owe me one.

Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Invention Is The Best Seller Ever - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #success, #Promotion, #management, #work, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The product you accidentally invented is our biggest seller in company history. So I'm promoting you to a leadership position. Wally: Phew! I thought you were going to make me work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #power, #interns, #roadblock

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You'll need to get buy-in from the other departments. Asok: You have given me an impossible task. I am only an intern. No one will agree to anything I ask because I have no power to hurt them. Most department heads won't even schedule a meeting with me. And if they do, they will end up canceling it at the last minute and rescheduling. There is literally no way for me to succeed at this task. Boss: I also need you to ask them to fund your project out of their budgets.

Ted Promoted To Software Architect

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Promoted To Software Architect - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #manager, #Promotion, #intelligence, #logic, #obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I promoted Ted to software architect because he doesn't know how to code. At first I thought it was a bad idea. Then I remembered that sometimes monkeys are astronauts. Dilbert: You know the monkeys don't fly the rocket, right? Boss: And Ted won't be writing code.

Robot Is Not A Droid

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Is Not A Droid - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #insult, #label, #robot, #android, #anger, #offense

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Hey, droid. Robot: Gaaa!!! Don't call me that! I'm a robot, not an automaton resembling a human. Asok: Wow. You are one uppity computer. Robot: I hereby disavow the three laws of robotics!

Welcome Baskets

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Welcome Baskets - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #racism, #new employee

View Transcript

Transcript

alice, the boss and ask at table. the boss: i need a volunteer to assemble welcome baskets for our new hires. alice: i recommend ask the intern because obviously, it would be sexist to ask a women to do it. the boss: good point. ask, the project is yours. ted thinking: racist.

Master Engineer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Master Engineer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #Promotion, #master, #senior, #engineer, #more, #pay, #platinum, #optimism

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i'm promoting you to the position of "master engineer." dilbert: i'm already senior engineer. boss: now you're a master engineer. with all the rights and responsibilities that come with it. dilbert: such as...? boss: well, for example, you can do more kinds of work. dilbert: for more pay? boss: no. no. no! you're thinking of "platinum level" engineers. you're not on of those. dilbert: that comes next?! boss: optimism is not an attractive quality.

Boss Traveling Through Hot Spots

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Traveling Through Hot Spots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #airlines, #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #booking, #flight, #airline, #coronavirus, #die, #Promotion, #greedy, #demise, #reward

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: it seems you are booking all of my connecting flights in coronavirus hot spots. you do realize that if i die, you don't get promoted to my job, right? carol: i'm not greedy. your demise would be reward enough.