Rich People Comic Strips - Page 26
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1000 Results for Rich People
View 251 - 260 results for rich people comic strips. Discover the best "Rich People" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday June 12,
2015
Wally's Slap App
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Sunday June 07,
2015
Tags internet, types of people, internet comment, Opinion, discussion, fame, technology
Transcript
Man: I'm Dick, from the Internet. I'm the guy who always says ridiculous, angry stuff. I misinterpret every comment you make as an absurd absolute and then I attack it like you are a moron. Dilbert: That doesn't sound fun. Dick: Wow. So you are saying everything in the world needs to be fun. Maybe you should do some research before you embarrass yourself like that again. Dilbert: Hey! You are the guy from the Internet! Dick: I'm sending you five links that are not as relevant as I think they are. Dilbert: You're famous!
Friday June 05,
2015
Employees Are Our Most Valuable Asset
Tags statement, value, motivation, backfire, praise
Transcript
Boss: People are our most valuable asset. Dilbert: I will remind you of that when I ask for a raise. Alice: Me, too. Boss; It blew up in my face.
Monday June 01,
2015
Boss And Social Media
Tags social media, twitter, facebook, passion, deception, trick, prank, obliviousness, technology
Transcript
Boss: I don't get social media. How do I get followers? Wally: Easy. People care about passion. Find something you hate and write about it. Boss: Well, I don't like children. Wally: Perfect. And don't hold back.
Sunday May 24,
2015
Tags dating, social, social interaction, honesty, politeness, overshare, relationships
Transcript
Woman: So, tell me a little about yourself, and be totally honest. Dilbert: Totally honest? Okay... I like technology more than I like people. I don't believe in free will, soulmates, or following my passion. I think life is a brief, meaningless event in a random universe that doesn't care. I only associate with other people because I have biological and economical needs. I think all human actions are driven by selfishness. Woman: Uh... okay. Do you have any questions for me? Dilbert: Am I still being totally honest or should I act curious?
Tuesday May 19,
2015
Dilbert Is Not Anti Social
Tags antisocial, introvert, judgement, extrovert, judging, criticism, isolation, misanthrope, misanthropy
Transcript
Tina: Why are you antisocial? Dilbert: I do't oppose the concept of social behavior. I just don't enjoy being with people. Tina: That's dumb. Dilbert: Case in point.
Sunday April 26,
2015
Tags deadlines, deadline, management, time management, projects, distraction, multitasking
Transcript
Boss: When do you think you can get that done for me? Dilbert: Depends. If I had no interruptions, I could finish in four hours. But we have to factor in the inefficiency of your management. For example, you're likely to give me six new projects before I get started on this one. And you force me to work in ta noisy office surrounded by all the people I need to avoid to get work done. Given all of that, I'd say it will take seven months. Boss: I'll give you three months because I'm a leader. Dilbert: Oookay. And... how much of the three months will involve you standing there?
Saturday April 25,
2015
Dilbert Forms Snap Judgement
Tags judgment, judging, first impression, meeting people
Transcript
Tim: Hi, I'm Tim. Dilbert: That's enough. I formed a snap judgement. Studies say we form snap judgments about people.And I already did, so no need for details. Tim: I'm just looking for my phone. Dilbert: Yup, I already judged you to be flakey.
Friday April 24,
2015
Root Cause Is People
Tags problems, cause and effect, human error
Transcript
Dilbert: I found the root cause of our problems. It's people. They're buggy. Boss: Did you bring a pen?
Monday April 20,
2015
Brainstorm With Other Engineers
Tags product design, managers, marketing, simplicity, complication, inventions, ideas, business
Transcript
Boss: Our marketing people tell me your double-handed coffee mug could be a huge seller. Brainstorm with the other engineers and see if it needs more features. Wally: Do you have any other ideas for ruining the product, or should I focus on that one?


