Angrily Identify Problems Comic Strips - Page 26

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

265 Results for Angrily Identify Problems

View 251 - 260 results for angrily identify problems comic strips. Discover the best "Angrily Identify Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2017's comic on:


Tags #lying, #deception, #secret, #choosing, #choices

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Don't tell Dilbert I told you what he plans to do. Alice: What if he asks me how I found out? Man: You should lie. Alice: You have given me two bad choices. If I don't change my plans based on this new information, I'll have big problems. But if I act on it, Dilbert will ask me how I knew, and that will turn me into a liar. Man: Yes, those are your only options. Alice: Unless... Man: There's no "unless." You have only two options. Just two! Alice: Have you ever seen the view from the roof?

Wally Has A Car Problem

Thank you for voting.
Wally Has A Car Problem  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2018's comic on:


Tags #blame, #excuse, #laziness, #problems, #starbucks, #car problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Sorry I'm late. I had a car problem. Boss: What kind of car problem? Wally: I didn't get in it soon enough. Boss: That sounds like a "you" problem. Wally: Then my stupid car took me to Starbucks.

Absurd Absolute

Thank you for voting.
 Absurd Absolute - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 25, 2018's comic on:


Tags #software upgrade, #idiot, #absurd absolute, #admit when wrong, #eaten unicorn

View Transcript

Transcript

You're an idiot if you think the software upgrade will solve every one of our problems. Dilbert: Or are you an idiot for characterizing my reasonable idea as an absurd absolute? Why cant you admit when you're wrong? Dilbert: Same reason you've never eaten a unicorn.

Pill For Boss Conversations

Thank you for voting.
Pill For Boss Conversations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2018's comic on:


Tags #mental health, #mental illness, #crazy, #managers, #sanity, #insane

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Catbert thinks I'm causing mental problems in my employees. That's crazy, right? Carol: Hold that thought. My doctor prescribed pills for when I have to talk to you.

Smartphone Syndrome

Thank you for voting.
Smartphone Syndrome - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2018's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #smart phone, #compulsion, #addiction, #attention, #distraction, #mental health, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: You've got a bad case of smartphone syndrome. One of hundred percent of your mental and physical problems are caused by using your phone too much. I don't feel as if I'm getting through to you. Alice texting: She's still talking. LOL.

Ai For Productivity

Thank you for voting.
Ai For Productivity - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2018's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #meeting, #productivity, #obliviousness, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We started using A.I. to identify when employees are unproductive. Device: Ping ping ping ping ping ping. Boss: Looks like this meeting is setting off some alarms.

Comparing Things

Thank you for voting.
Comparing Things - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 08, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #giraffe, #solution

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Your proposed solution has too many problems. Dilbert: You're not good at comparing things. The Boss: Pfft. I'm way better at it than a giraffe.

Wally Covers For Alice

Thank you for voting.
Wally Covers For Alice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 2018's comic on:


Tags #alice, #heat, #thousand suns, #vacation, #Wally

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I'm back from vacation. Did you have any problems covering for me? Wally: No problem at all I saved all of your work for when you got back. Alice: I hate you with the heat of a thousand suns! Wally: How was your vacation? Was it relaxing?

Unforseen Risks

Thank you for voting.
Unforseen Risks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #blame, #boss, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #risks

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How can you be sure there are no unforeseen risks with this plan? Dilbert: It is not possible to know if one has considered every risk. Therefore, we can never be sure. Boss: So...I can still blame you for any problems that pop up? Dilbert: Yes, that part of the process is still intact.

Toxic Employee And Tina

Thank you for voting.
Toxic Employee And Tina - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #problem

View Transcript

Transcript

toxic employee: hi. i'm the new toxic employee. i sense you don't have enough problems, so i came to give you some. tina: ha! i'm too smart to fall for that. toxic employee: that's what i told dilbert, but he smirked.