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View 251 - 260 results for new product comic strips. Discover the best "New Product" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags masters degress, top colleges, new hires

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The Boss says, "From now on, we'll only hire people with masters degrees from the top colleges." Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at the conference table. Wally says,"I don't have a masters degree from a top college. I'm insulted by this new policy." The Boss holds up a picture of Wally with a line above his head. The Boss says, "And new hires must be this tall to work here." Wally yells, "HEY!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new policy, discriminate against single people, legal, marital staus, no reason, home, polygamists

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At a staff me Boss meets with Dilbert and Wally. The Boss says, "My new policy is to discriminate against single people. It's totally legal!" The Boss holds up a piece of paper and says, "Write your marital status on this list so I know who has no reason to go home at night." They all leave the meetin and the Boss looks at the list. He says, "Dang! What are the odds you'd all be polygamists?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new computer, dispose of old computer, engineering solution

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Wally tells Dilbert, "I'm not allowed to get a new computer until I get rid of this old one." Wally continues, "The janitor won't allow it in the trash; Union rules won't let me carry it to storage. So I built this catapult." Wally catapults the computer over the cubicle and says, "Like I always say, every problem has an engineering solution."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, looks smarter, look dumber, ooga

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As Alice is working, a man comes up and says, "Alice, I'm the new guy. I look smarter than the people who already work here." Man's appearance starts to change. His body looks more prehistoric. He says, "As you get to know me, I'll look dumber and dumber." Man looks like a prehistoric man with a huge forehead now. Alice says, "That was fast." Man says, "Ooga."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags promise customers, product not yet designed, motto, ask forgiveness, seek permission, design work

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Bob tells Alice and Dilbert, "Maybe it was wrong to promise our customers a product that hasn't been designed yet." Bob says, "But our motto in marketing is, "'It's better to ask for forgiveness than to seek permission.'" Alice holds Bob over the roof. He is dangling. Dilbert says, "Your motto needs some design work too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags strategy lockup meeting, meeting won't end, new strategy, wedge my broom

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Alice, Dilbert, and The Boss sitting at table. The Boss says, "Our top executives are in a special strategy lockup meeting." The Boss continues, "The meeting won't end until they agree on a new strategy, so it might be a while." Janitor places a broom in handle of the meeting room door and thinks, "Maybe if I wedge my broom here I won't forget where I put it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags m, new ceo, ethical person, sinking ship, plunder treasure, take challenge

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Dilbert and Wally standing outside a cubicle holding mugs. Dilbert says, "An executive search firm is trying to find a new C.E.O. for us." Wally says, "It'll be tough." Wally says, "No ethical person would board a sinking ship just to plunder its treasure." Ted and Dogbert sitting at table. Sheet of paper in front of Dogbert. Ted hands Dogbert a pen and says, "Are you ready to take the challenge?" Dogbert responds, "Oh, I'll take more than that!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, name, wallet, hunts for wallet, appears like hug

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Alice stands in her cubicle with the headless man. Alice says, "If we're going to work together, I should know your name." Alice says, "Let's see if you have a wallet with some identification." Alice huge the headless man, her hands in his back pockets. Wally walks by. Wally says, "Geez, Alice, could you let the new guy settle in first?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, drivers license, ed les mann, edward mann, headless man, name, new hire, office

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Wally and Alice stand with the headless man. Alice looks at his wallet. Alice says, "According to his driver's license, the new guy's name is Edward Mann." Wally says, "Is his middle name Lester?" Alice says, "How did you know that?" Wally says, "What we have here is an Ed Les Mann."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new hire, not working, no head, headless man, made mistake hiring, fired, insubordination

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Dilbert walks up to the Boss. Dilbert guides the headless man by the collar. Dilbert says, "The new guy isn't working out." The Boss says, "Why not?" Dilbert says, "Maybe because he has no head." The Boss frowns. The Boss says,"So, you think that I made a mistake hiring him?" Dilbert says, "Um... no. But the new guy thinks so." The boss shakes his fists. The Boss says, "Then he's fired for insubordination."