Used Pen Comic Strips - Page 26

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

268 Results for Used Pen

View 251 - 260 results for used pen comic strips. Discover the best "Used Pen" comics from Dilbert.com.

Our Api

Thank you for voting.
Our Api - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2018's comic on:


Tags #hackers, #hacking, #api, #jargon, #obliviousness, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: Dogbert The Reporter. Dogbert: How did hackers get access to your customer data? CEO: I'm told they used something called "our A.P.I." to suck out all the data. Dogbert: I'll just say you'er stupid. CEO: Why does everyone always say that?

Gravy On Keyboard

Thank you for voting.
Gravy On Keyboard - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Wally, #tina, #gravy, #keyboard, #coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Do you know why my keyboard has gravy all over it? Dilbert: Oh, sorry, my phone rang while I was eating at my desk and I didn't have a napkin so I used your keyboard. Tina: I... Don't even know how to respond to that. Wally: Phew! That's what I was hoping.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #employees, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #video games

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?

Jargon

Thank you for voting.
Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 2018's comic on:


Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.

New Forms

Thank you for voting.
New Forms - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 29, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #money, #office, #office workers, #efficiency

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did you approve my budget request? Boss: No, you used the old form. Dilbert: Do we have new forms? Boss: In hindsight, we should have funded the creation of new budget request forms before we made the old ones obsolete.

Forming Your Own Opinions

Thank you for voting.
Forming Your Own Opinions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Opinion, #social media, #current events, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I used to form my own opinions about current events. Now I just copy whatever the people I follow on social media say. Dilbert: Where do they get their opinions from? Boss: From something called an algorithm.

Social Media Mind Control

Thank you for voting.
Social Media Mind Control - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 09, 2019's comic on:


Tags #control, #social media, #selfie, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Are you worried that the algorithms used by social media platforms are a form of mind control? Boss: I...am not...worried about...that. Wally: Maybe we should have had this conversation sooner. Boss: Must...post...selfie...

The Bad Analogy Guy

Thank you for voting.
The Bad Analogy Guy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 2019's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #office workers, #sarcasm, #war

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This meeting reminds me of the sixth elbonian revolution. Therefore, logically, this meeting will end with bayonets. Asok: What's wrong with you? Man: Can I borrow your pen?

Dilbert Is No Longer His Name

Thank you for voting.
Dilbert Is No Longer His Name - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #gender, #managers & supervisors, #men and women, #office workers, #respect, #salary

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My name used to be Dilbert, but my boss ordered me to identify as a woman. That way he can claim he pays men and women the same. Woman: I just lost all respect for your company. Dilbert: That was going to happen either way.

Dogbert Designed The Simulation

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert Designed The Simulation - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 2019's comic on:


Tags #technology, #simulation, #creator, #three dimensional, #avatar, #truth, #made

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: i didn't want to tell you this, but you're a simulation designed by a three-dimensional creator. and i'm an avatar used by your creator to interact with your world. dilbert: i refuse to believe that is true dogbert: yep. that's how i made you