Thought Diveristy Comic Strips - Page 27

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

268 Results for Thought Diveristy

View 261 - 268 results for thought diveristy comic strips. Discover the best "Thought Diveristy" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dinosaurs, #joke, #pun, #puns

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I can't believe it; all this time I thought dinosaurs were extinct, but they were just hiding in my house. Hello, A-1 Exterminator? I have dinosaurs... what kind?... I don't know. I've only heard them... Dinosaur: Thesaurus. Dilbert: Maybe a Thesaurus or two... hello?

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #letter, #phone call, #prison, #postage

View Transcript

Transcript

The telephone rings. Dilbert picks up the phone and says, "Hello." The voice on the other end says, "This is the governor . . ." The governor says, "Do you remember that snotty letter you wrote about prison overcrowding? We thought YOU might want to look after one of our guys for thiry or forty years." The doorbell rings. A large man in a prison uniform says, "Hi. I'm Bob. My friends would call me 'Strangler' if they were alive." Bob carries a suitcase into the house and asks, "So, where do you keep the blunt objects? Sure is crowded in here." Dilbert clenches his fist and says, "Ooh! I am so tempted to fire off another letter over this!!" Dogbert says, "Yeah! 'Postage due' this time!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #Women, #personality, #technology, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert says, "There . . . My program proves that pretty women have extremely bad personalities." Dilbert continues, "This is based on the input that pretty women are never nice to me." Dogbert asks, "Why does the screen say 'or you are a geek?'" Dilbert replies, "Darn! I thought I fixed that bug."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #love, #marriage, #cure, #technology, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert shouts, "Dogbert! Dogbert! Come here quickly!!" Dilbert says, "My computer simulation has discovered the chemical that causes LOVE!" Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a desk. Dilbert explains, "Apparently, it deactivates the parts of the brain responsible for critical thought and eating." Dogbert says, "Wow! You can inject people with that chemical and make them fall in love!" Dilbert says, "I was thinking more along the lines of a cure . . ." Dogbert replies, "Oh, like marriage."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #nose, #office workers, #presentation, #itch

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at the front of a room giving a presentation. He points to a diagram and says, ". . . And as you can see . . ." Dilbert wiggles his nose and thinks, "Uh oh . . . I got an itch in my nose." Dilbert thinks, ". . . Can't scratch it now without looking unprofessional." Dilbert thinks, "Maybe I can casually scratch it with one smooth gesture toward the easel." Back at home, Dilbert sits in his chair with a bandage on his nose. Dilbert says, "There's a good chance they thought it was part of the presentation." Dogbert asks, "Did the paramedics remove the pointer or just tape over it?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #heck, #shame, #minor

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Phil the Ruler of Heck, "Gosh, I thought 'Heck' was just a figure of speech." Phil replies, "Yeah. A lot of people think they can get away with minor infractions." Phil says, "According to my records, last month you deliberately asked for THREE little ketchups at McDonald's when you KNEW you only needed TWO." Dilbert says, "I knew that would come back to haunt me. Look, I still have the extra one. I'll give it back!" Phil shakes his spoon at Dilbert and says, "Shame shame . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #embarrassment, #joke, #tuxedo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is getting dressed and Dogbert sits on the bed watching him. Dilbert holds up a cummerbund and says, "I thought I had this tuxedo thing figured out, but what the heck is this?" Dogbert replies, "Oh, that's the kumberbuzle. You wear it on your head like a sweatband." Dogbert continues, "Then you clip your pens and pencils to the kumberbuzle." Dilbert says, "Ah, that explains why the shirt has no pocket."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #homeless persons, #real estate, #less fortunate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says, "I've decided to dedicate my life to the less fortunate." Dilbert replies, "That's very noble of you, Dogbert. Will you be working with the homeless, or perhaps the hungry?" Dogbert replies, "I thought I'd start with people who didn't buy real estate in the 70's . . . Maybe work my way up to that other stuff."