Shake Hands Comic Strips - Page 27

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499 Results for Shake Hands

View 261 - 270 results for shake hands comic strips. Discover the best "Shake Hands" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags budding forearm, bone crushing handshake, hen party, insulted by wally, alice shakes hand

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Alice stands with Tina the Tech Writer. Alice holds a hand exerciser. Alice says, "I've beem building up my forearm so I'll have a bone-crushing handshake." Tina says, "Why?" Wally walks up. Wally says, "Hey, what's this - some sort of hen party?" Alice reaches out to shake Wally's hand. Alice smiles. Alice says, "That was very witty, Wally. Congratulations!" Tina says, "Oh."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags broken binder award, once in a lifetime award, peers, dumping trash

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Asok sits at his computer. Dilbert hands him a binder. Dilbert says, "Asok, you're the winner of the prestigious "Broken Binder Award"." Asok smiles. Dilbert says, "It's a once-in-a-lifetime award that is voted on by your peers." Wally and Dilbert stand in front of Asok's cubicle. Inside the cubicle Asok holds the binder and cheers. Wally says, "How long have you been dumping your trash here?" Dilbert says, "Since my can got full."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags need by tomorrow, work all night, sound grateful, boss, last minute assignment, put upoin, asks dilbert, ungrateful boss

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The Boss hands Dilbert a piece of paper. The Boss says, "This is urgent. I need it by tomorrow." Dilbert says, "You've known about this for weeks. Now I'll have to work all night!" Dilbert says, "Could you at least say something that sounds grateful?" The boss says, "I'm glad I'm me!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags strip on nose, oxygen to brain, interesting conversationalist, not optimistic, anti snoring device

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Dilbert and Dogbert sit on the couch. Dogbert says, "Put this strip on your nose to get more oxygen to your brain." Dogbert hands Dilbert a strip. Dilbert puts the strip on his nose. Dogbert says, "I'm hoping it will make you a more interesting conversationalist." Dilbert says, "How 'bout that?" The strip is hanging off the end of Dilbert's nose. Dogbert says, "I'm no longer optimistic."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags new guy, name, wallet, hunts for wallet, appears like hug

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Alice stands in her cubicle with the headless man. Alice says, "If we're going to work together, I should know your name." Alice says, "Let's see if you have a wallet with some identification." Alice huge the headless man, her hands in his back pockets. Wally walks by. Wally says, "Geez, Alice, could you let the new guy settle in first?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dogbert the consultant, ad campign, tony sincereity, introdcue prodcut, invisible robot, empty box

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Caption: Dogbert the consultant. Dogbert sits at the conference table with Alice and Dilbert. Dogbert says, "Our ad campaign featuring phony sincerity is working." Dogberts hands Alice and Dilbert pieces of paper. Dogbert says, "In phase two, we'll introduce our newest product, the invisible robot." Alice says, "We don't know how to make an invisible robot." Dogbert says, "Do you know how to make an empty box?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technical recommendation, keen insights, boss immaturity

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Alice stands by the Boss's desk. The boss reads a piece of paper. The Boss says, "I don't understand your technical recommendation Alice." The Boss puts his hands to his temples. The Boss says, "I will rely on my keen insights about you as an engineer." Alice says, "That too would require knowledge on your part." The Boss says, "Shush!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags non employee certification, messenger, secretary, receptionist, carol, Dilbert, process raise

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Dilbert sits at his computer. Carol hands him a piece of paper. Carol says, "You need to sign the non-employee certification form before I process your raise." Dilbert looks at the form. Dilbert says, "But this would be a lie. I'm not a non-employee." Carol says, "I'm only the messenger." Dilbert says, "Where did this come from?" Carol says, "The file cabinet."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags legalese, totally incomprehensible, legal rights, involuntary biological testing

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Dilbert stands in front of Carol's desk. Dilbert holds a piece of paper. Dilbert says, "You expect me to sign this? The legalese is totally incomprehensible." Carol hands Dilbert a pen. Carol says, "You will." Dilbert is mad. Dilbert says, "Do you expect me to give up legal rights just because it's too hard to figure out what any of it means?" Carol says, "Yes." Carol sys, "And initial the "involuntary boilogical testing" box. Dilbert looks annoyed. Dilbert signs and says, "Okay, okay!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags experimental medical procedures, unicron, antidepressant, therapy, instructions, will make laugh, psychology

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The Boss pionts a big ray gun like machine at Alice, Dilbert and Wally. The Boss says, "Our new line of business is testing experimental medical procedures on employees." Alice, Dilbert and Wally look shocked. The Boss says, "Today's test is called the unicorn antidepressant therapy." The Boss fiddles with the machine. The Boss says, "According to the instructions, in a few minutes, I'll see something that will make me laugh." Alice looks upward at a bump beginning to grow on her forhead. Dilbert and Wally put their hands to their brows.