Nothing To Fear Comic Strips - Page 28

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

471 Results for Nothing To Fear

View 271 - 280 results for nothing to fear comic strips. Discover the best "Nothing To Fear" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #rudeness, #selfishness, #stories, #goat cistume, #donated organs, #hollow torso, #backpack, #zipper, #family of squirrels

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Returns Dilbert says, "I dreamed I was wearing a goat costume." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I donated all of my organs to sick people. Now I use my hollow torso like a backpack." "Dilbert says, "And I tried to go on a date." Topper says, "See my zipper? I took in a family of squirrels!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coworker, #request, #people, #project, #generic advice, #sitting at desk, #tail wagging, #hate, #angry, #replace, #inspire

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the Generic Manager Man says, "We need more people on the project." Dogbert says, "Figure it out. Work smarter not harder. Make a plan. Move some things around. Adjust priorities. Just get it done. Give me a status report." Man says, "That did nothing but make me hate you." Dogbert says, "I can replace you with someone who will pretend to be inspired."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #presentation, #sales division, #public speaking, #scared, #fear, #stomach in mouth

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Asok, I need you to help Alice give a presentation to 500 sales reps." GMPH!!! The Boss says, "Is that your stomach?" Asok says, "Yeth."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #customer, #wear jacket, #lazy, #optimism, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I'm on my way to a meeting with a prospective customer." Wally says, "We have such a long sales gestation period that the value of my efforts won't be known for two years." Wally says, "Just remember that optimism looks exactly like doing nothing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new product, #block of wood, #ceo, #salesman, #high forehead, #inneundo, #leader

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Your product is nothing but a piece of wood. You need a charismatic pitchman to make gullible consumers buy it." Dogbert says, "Normally that would be your job as CEO. Unfortunately, you remind people of a giant?" CEO says, "Leader?" Dogbert says, "Exactly."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pitchman, #new product, #salesman, #block of wood, #machine, #rays, #reality distortion, #stand on stool, #consumers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the Pitchman Dogbert says, "Fire up the reality distortion field as soon as I'm introduced." Dogbert says, "Our product is nothing but a block of wood, and yet you need three of them." Man says, "I am a creative individual who does as he is told." Man 2 says, "I can't feel my arm!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #entrepreneurial, #Advice, #drink coffee, #fail, #do nothing, #annoyed

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "I'm taking your advice to be more entrepreneurial at my job." Wally says, "Failing 90% of the time is very similar to not trying at all. I'm pretty sure you won't be able to tell the difference." Wally says, "Which one am I doing now?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee, #human resources, #Promotion, #raise, #facebook; social networks, #excited, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert says, "For the past six months you've done nothing but update your Facebook page." Catbert says, "Now we have an opening for a marketing manager for social networks and you're totally qualified. It's a huge raise and promotion." Man says, "Crime pays! I knew it!!!" Catbert says, "We're hoping you can lie as well as you steal."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #question, #nonsense, #optimize, #value stream, #surprise, #talk, #listening

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Are you leveraging our resources to optimize the client value stream?" Asok says, "What?" Wally says, "I'm just messing with you? Nothing I say in meetings actually means anything." Asok says, "Then why do you talk?" Wally says, "I tried listening once. It was awful."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cheer up, #happiness, #comparing yourself, #reference group, #successful member, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "I feel like a failure. Say something to cheer me up?" Dogbert says, "Happiness comes from comparing yourself to a reference group that is relatively worse off." Dogbert says, "You're a successful member of the reference group." Dilbert says, "And that's not nothing!"