Time Comic Strips - Page 28
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1000 Results for Time
View 271 - 280 results for time comic strips. Discover the best "Time" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday November 29,
2020
Dogbert Does Telemedicine
Tags business, technology, telemedicine, time, doctor, health, pain, rake, leaves, medicine
Transcript
dogbert: i started doing telemedicine in my spare time. Dilbert: don't you need to be a doctor to do that? dogbert: technically, yes. but i found a workaround. dilbert: which is? dogbert: i tell people i'm a doctor. patient: doctor, i have a sharp pain in the back of my thigh. dogbert: are you sitting on a rake? patient: that's a weird question. oh. wait, i am. what should i do? dogbert: try picking up leaves with your hands.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday November 19,
2020
Dilbert Not On Mute
Tags business, meetings, video conference, zoom, time-wasting, fool, mute
Transcript
Dilbert on a video conference call and voices coming from laptop" We've been going for two hours, so let's wrap up... i have a new topic... dilbert: Gaaa!!! why is there always on time-wasting fool on every zoom call??? why? why? voice from laptop: dilbert, you're not on mute. dilbert: oh. did you hear my tv? i'll turn it down.
Saturday December 12,
2020
Read The Article
Tags business, office workers, article, feedback, time, waste, thoughts
Transcript
co-worker: can i get your thoughts on the article i emailed to you? dilbert: okay. my thoughts are that i don't want to waste my time reading any articles you send to me. co-worker: can you dive a bit deeper? dilbert: okay. i also don't like talking to you.
Tuesday March 02,
2021
Talking To Wally
Tags mental health, office workers, health, alone time, listen, crazy, hate, talking, fake, empathy, business, coffee
Transcript
dilbert: dogbert doesn't believe me when i tell him i need more alone time for my mental health. wally: why would he listen to you when you're obviously crazy? dilbert: i hate talking to you. wally: should i fake more empathy.
Sunday March 21,
2021
Tina Asks For Help
Tags business, co-workers, colleague, draft, review, busy, yes, time, sarcastic, sarcasm, suspicious, answer, innocent
Transcript
tina: do you have a few minutes to review my first draft? dilbert: yes. tina: i ask because usually you say you're to busy to help. dilbert: well, i said yes this time. tina: that's funny, because usually you're all, "i'm so busy." but today you have all the time in the world. dilbert: today i'm not busy. tina: i find that suspicious. dilbert yelling: take yes for an answer!!! tina: that's not how innocent people talk.
Friday April 23,
2021
Zoom Could Have Been Worse
Tags business, embarrassment, technology, video call, zoom, time, waste, meeting, imbeciles, mic
Transcript
dilbert with dogbert on video call. dilbert: what a waste of time this zoom meeting is. i hate dealing with imbeciles. voice from laptop: your mic is on. dogbert: could have been worse.
Wednesday April 13,
2011
Tags appeal, bad person, business ethics, comparison shopping, guilt, molt, prevents competitors, raising prices
Transcript
Dilbert: Our products only appeal to people who aren't good at comparison shopping. But I justify it because our existence prevents competitors from raising prices. Am I a bad person? Dogbert: I molt a little bit every time you talk.
Thursday May 05,
2011
Tags frustration, office workers, solving problem, stadardization policies, high five
Transcript
Dilbert: Congratulations on solving every important problem in the world. I assume that's what happened. Otherwise, you wouldn't have time to create desk standardization policies. High five?
Sunday April 10,
2011
Tags anxiety, stress, meltdown cubicle, theoretical workload limit, brains full, becomes overdue, projects overdue, tasks, urgent, funny noise, missed dead line
Transcript
Voice: Meltdown in cubicle 459540! Dilbert: That's Te. He must have reached his T.W.L. Asok: His what? Dilbert: Theoretical workload limit. In layman's terms, his brain is full. It starts when just one of your projects becomes overdue. You end up spending all of your time explaining why you didn't get it done. That makes all of your other projects overdue. When ever task become urgent, your brain can't decide what to do next. Brains make a funny noise when they shut down. Noise: Poink. Asok: Uh-oh. I just missed a deadline. Wally: And so it begins.
Wednesday May 11,
2011
Tags computer software, internet & world wide web, coding, paywall, website, wrote script, new content, idea to eliminate, revenue, lowered costs, technology
Transcript
Boss: Wally, did you finish coding the paywall for our website? Wally: I did something better. I wrote a script to delete any new content as soon as it's posted. At bonus time, keep in mind that you're the one who had the idea to eliminate revenue, and I'm the one who lowered hosting costs.

