Best Comedy So Far Comic Strips - Page 28

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View 271 - 280 results for best comedy so far comic strips. Discover the best "Best Comedy So Far" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email, #boss, #clear, #nonsense, #act randomly, #turn on and off

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Dilbert says, "I got your e-mail. It almost made sense." Dilbert says, "My plan is to act randomly and hope for the best." The Boss says, "Perhaps I can be more clear." Dilbert says, "Really? You can just turn it on and off like that?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #get coffee, #answer question, #block exit, #stuck, #airvent, #game, #feet

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Coworker says, "Wally do you have a minute?" Wally says, "Nope I'm far too busy." Coworker says, "I'm blocking the only exit. You have no choice but to answer my question." Coworker says, "I blocked the air vent too." Wally says, "Well played."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talk over people, #jumbled typ face, #escalate, #lisening, #fun part

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Dogbert says, "I've decided to escalate my anti-social behavior from not listening, to actively talking over other people." Dilbert says, "How can you enjoy the conversation of others if you don't listen?" Dogbert says, "This could be one of the best ideas I've ever had." Dogbert says, "It all came together when I realized that listening isn't the fun part."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #competitor from future, #terminate company, #issue, #time travle, #robot building skills, #zombies

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Dilbert says, "A competitor from the future is sending robots back in time to terminate our company." Dilbert says, "So far it's not much of an issue because their time travel technology is way ahead of their robot-building skills." Wally says, "Is that as fun as it looks?" Alice says, "Totally. They're like zombies, but crunchier."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #unemployment, #depressed, #rudeness, #conversation

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Dogbert says, "What's the worst part about you being unemployed?" Dogbert says, "Is it the risk of starvation, the inability to date, or the feeling of being utterly worthless?" Dilbert says, "So far the worst part is this conversation." Dogbert says, "Wait 'til you hear my tough love speech."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stupidity, #ignorant, #cruel, #clueless, #angry, #yelling

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The boss says, "I hired a temp to cover your job while you're on vacation." The boss says, "She's far more qualified than you, and her stated goal is to replace you but don't worry." Carol says, "How am I supposed to not worry about that?" The Boss says, "yoga?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #proposition, #marriage, #ridiculous, #confused, #reading, #explanation, #relationships

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Alice says, "I crunched the numbers, and it makes sense for us to get married." Alice says, "I can maintain my lifestyle if you live in the closet and your only hobby is cleaning my house when I'm gone." Alice says, "If that doesn't work, I can insure the bejeezus out of you and hope for the best." Dilbert says, "The best?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #sitting, #asking, #money, #present, #punch, #violence, #pain, #flying, #technology

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Asok says, "I'm collecting money for our pointy-haired boss' birthday." Punch! The boss says, "How much did we get so far?" Asok says, "Well, nothing you could send by FedEx."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #writing, #newsletter, #reading, #ridicule, #Family, #annoyed

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Tina says, "I've been asked to chronicle your rise to management for the company newsletter." Tina says, "So far, I have the story of how your father was a barrel-shaped moron who married a blind woman." Tina says, "But it could have been the other way around. I'm mostly guessing." The boss says, "Lucky guess."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #finances, #idea, #ridiculous, #asking, #unsure, #corrupt, #business

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Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "We're getting into the financial services game." Dogbert says, "That way all of our products can be imaginary." Man says, "Can you give me reliable investment advice?" Man says, "Yes, as far as I know."