Avoid Work Comic Strips - Page 29
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1000 Results for Avoid Work
View 281 - 290 results for avoid work comic strips. Discover the best "Avoid Work" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday February 21,
1999
Tags weekly wally report, pointy haired troll, dumped record, levels of work, moral delemma, disappoint stock holders, last ounce of happiness, one choice, reading ahead, assignments
Transcript
Wally, the boss, Dilbert and Alice are in a meeting. Wally says, "It's time now for the weekly Wally report." Wally says, "By Tuesday the pointy-haired troll had dumped record levels of work on poor Wally." Wally says, "Wally's happiness was in extreme jeapardy." Wally says, "It was a moral dilemma too." Wally says, "Would Wally disappoint the stockholders to save his own skin?" Wally says, "Or would he fight with his last ounce of happiness to complete all the assignments?" Wally says, "In the end there was only one choice." Dilbert says, "You wrote the Wally report instead of working?" Wally says, "Stop reading ahead!"
Friday January 05,
2001
Tags created software, copyrighted work, available, for free, plunge, depression, creativity, psychology
Transcript
Asok the Intern says to Dilbert, "I created software that makes all copyrighted work on the net available for free!" Dilbert asks Asok, "Wouldn't that destroy all forms of creativity and plunge us into a depression?" Asok says to Dilbert, "Yes... But it is very neat."
Saturday January 13,
2001
Tags hard work, signing praises, then die, reality, inspirational speeches
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "If you work hard, you can achieve great things!" The Boss says, "And then you die." Wally, Dilbert and Alice weep as The Boss says, "It never pays to mix reality with inspirational speeches."
Friday January 19,
2001
Tags exactly man, sell ten million, idea won't work, idea makes better
Transcript
THE "EXACTLY" MAN: Randy, looking at a piece of paper, says to Dilbert, "Your idea won't work. No one would buy this kind of product." Dilbert says, "We already sell ten million of these per year. My idea just makes them better." Randy exclaims, "Exactly!!" and Dilbert thinks, "?"
Monday February 05,
2001
Tags cockeyed, creepy guy, fail, good work, hired creep, products features, cape, cane
Transcript
The Boss: I hired a creep to help determine our products features. Creep: You need more features. The Boss: Good work. The boss;:When can you have that done? Dilbert: GAAA!!!
Tuesday February 06,
2001
Tags low battery indicator, work day and night, health decline, other peoples problems, creep likes
Transcript
The feature creep Creep: Is it too late to give our product a low battery indicator? Dilbert: Id have to work night and day for a month! My health would decline and Id miss all my objectives! Creep: I jus realized that other peoples problems make me all warm inside.
Saturday February 10,
2001
Tags all night flight, came to work, usual, jeopardize, missing work, park in lobby, out of it, disheveled
Transcript
A frazzled-looking Alice says to The Boss, "My flight took all night but I still came to work on time as usual." Alice continues, "I didn't want to jeopardize the company by missing work." A male co-worker says to Alice, "You're not allowed to park in the lobby." Alice yells, "Since when?!"
Wednesday April 04,
2001
Tags can't crush spirit, work in box, cubicle, demoralize, 2 jobs, coordinator died, died of boredom, quality assurance guys
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his computer and thinks, "They can make me work in a little box, but they can't crush my spirit." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Our ISO 9000 Coordinator died of boredom. You'll have to do his job plus yours." Dilbert's head sinks to his chest as The Boss says, "And one of the Quality Assurance guys is looking pale..."
Monday April 16,
2001
Tags mandatory lunchtime meetings, life work balance, high five, Catbert
Transcript
Catbert and the boss are sitting at a table. Catbert says, "How about mandatory lunchtime meetings?" The boss says, "On the subject of Work-Life Balance!" The boss and Catbert high five each other. Wally and Dilbert peek over a cubicle divider at the the boss, whose hand is bandaged. Wally says, "Uh-oh. He's been high-fiving Catbert again."
Tuesday May 08,
2001
Tags impersonate dead customer, large purchases, work, acting
Transcript
The Boss hands a black briefcase to Wally. He says, "You'll impersonate our dead customer and make large purchases from us." Wally looks down at the briefcase and says, "I've never done anything like this before." The Boss replies, "It's called 'work.'" Wally walks away, continuing to hold the briefcase. He asks, "Am I doing it right?"


