Desk Comic Strips - Page 29
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979 Results for Desk
View 281 - 290 results for desk comic strips. Discover the best "Desk" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday August 05,
1993
Tags Dilbert, ratbert, computer, natural disasters
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert says, "You know, as a rat I'm far more likely to survive a major environmental calamity." Ratbert continues, "And there's no shortage of potential disasters - you've got global warming, ozone depletion, air pollution . . ." Ratbert asks, "Can I try on one of your shirts?" Dilbert looks angry.
Friday August 06,
1993
Tags ratbert, Dilbert, computer
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert says, "I'd miss you if the human race died from pollution but rats lived on." Ratbert continues, "So I'm dedicating my life to learning the science of preserving humankind." Dilbert asks, "Conservation?" Ratbert replies, "Pickling."
Monday August 09,
1993
Tags Dilbert, zimbu the monkey
Transcript
Dilbert and Zimbu the Monkey sit across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I've got to cut staff in engineering. I'm trying to determine which one of you is more valuable to keep." The Boss says, "I've been hearing good things about Zimbu the Monkey. Which one of you is Zimbu the Monkey?" Dilbert and Zimbu both raise their hands. Dilbert thinks, "This is not the proudest moment of my professional career."
Tuesday August 17,
1993
Tags Dogbert, the boss, business consulting, pyschic
Transcript
Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk wearing a sorcerer's hat. Dogbert says, "I am Dogbert the Psychic Business Consultant. I can read minds." The Boss asks, "If you can read minds, what's my favorite color?" Dogbert replies, "Your favorite color is puce, but you are mistakenly thinking of a primary color because you don't know what puce is." The Boss says, "Whoa . . . I just got a shiver."
Friday August 20,
1993
Tags the boss, Dogbert, Wally, pyschic, business consulting, computer
Transcript
Dogbert says to the Boss, "I sense death . . ." Dogbert and the Boss stand behind Wally's desk. Dogbert says, "It's coming from here. Yes, he's definitely dead." Dogbert says to the Boss, "You should bury him. He already smells bad." Wally says, "I'll bet this isn't heaven."
Monday August 23,
1993
Tags Dilbert, the boss, computer
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "I'm sending you to our plant in Elbonia. I want you to teach them 'quality.'" The Boss continues, "I selected you because you've been there and you know their language." Dilbert replies, "They speak English." The Boss says, "Oh, then I guess it's because I hate you."
Tuesday August 31,
1993
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, computer, Politics, taxes
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert asks, "Do you realize the government takes half of all the money you make?" Dogbert continues, "And the majority of people are too young to vote, or didn't bother to vote, or voted for the loser. . . . And nobody alive voted for our constitution." Dilbert replies, "It's never good when you have these insights." Dogbert says, "I've decided to levy my own tax on people."
Thursday September 09,
1993
Tags ratbert, Dilbert, computer, singing, barry manilow
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk and Ratbert stands on the monitor. Ratbert says, "I figured that you would respect me more if I had some sort of talent." Ratbert says, "So I taught myself to sing Barry Manilow's greatest hits while slapping my head rhythmically." Ratbert sings, "A-a-at the Copa (slap) ow! Copa Cabana (slap) ow!" Dilbert says, "I'm actually enjoying this and it deeply disturbs me."
Tuesday September 14,
1993
Tags Dogbert, the boss, consultant, management
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk and says, "I'm a 'blame consultant.'" The Boss thinks, "I've seen him before." Dogbert explains, "For a large fee I will tell the workers that the problems in the company are THEIR fault, not yours. It's the latest management fad." The Boss asks, "Won't they see right through that?" Dogbert asks, "Is that MY fault??!"
Friday September 17,
1993
Tags Dogbert, the boss, management, consulting
Transcript
Dogbert stands on the Boss's desk next to a large binder. Dogbert says, "Here's my consulting report on your company." Dogbert says, "I had no insights so I bulked it up by adding witty analogies." The Boss reads, "His head was like a hollow putty ball attacked by two pointy dust bunnies." Dogbert asks, "Vivid, isn't it?"


