Business Ethics Comic Strips - Page 29
Search Filters
Year
- 2023
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
1000 Results for Business Ethics
View 281 - 290 results for business ethics comic strips. Discover the best "Business Ethics" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday September 17,
2013
Tags lying, new business, professional liar, albis, job refernces, annual reports, born evil
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm starting a new business as a professional liar. I'll provide alibis, job references, annual reports, and that sort of thing. Dilbert; Were you born evil? Dogbert: It feels as if someone else had a hand in it.
Wednesday October 30,
2013
Tags eating & drinking, engineers, etiquette & ethics, crone, etiquette class, fork, teach things
Transcript
Boss: I hired a desiccated crone to teach an etiquette class to you engineering heathens. She'll help you stop eating your business lunches like kidnap victims. Crone: When do you use this fork? Alice: When I'm too lazy to make a shiv?
Tuesday February 11,
2014
Tags allegiance, patents, corporate secuirty, shadowy figure, secrets, offering, alternatives, repeat business
Transcript
Boss: If a shadowy figure offers to buy company secrets, what should you do? Dilbert: How much is he offering? Boss: That shouldn't matter. Dilbert: How can I compare alternatives? Wally: Would there be any repeat business in this scenario? Corporate Security
Wednesday March 26,
2014
Tags efficiency experts, stress, consultant, booze muhkidney, business travel, nightmare, business
Transcript
Boss: I hired a consultant from the respected firm Booz Muhkidney. Consultant: My life is a nightmare of business travel, loneliness, and sleep deprivation. I'm only 25 years old! Boss: It's a travel day. He'll calm down after he drinks lunch.
Thursday March 27,
2014
Tags efficiency experts, stress, consultant, booze muhkidney, travel work, unhealthy food, total failure, sleepless nights, power point slides, business
Transcript
Consultant: All I do is travel, work, and eat unhealthy food. I'm a total failure at managing my own life, and yet people hire me for business advice. I haven't slept since October. Dilbert: I was told there would be PowerPoint slides. Consultant from Booze Muhkidney
Monday April 21,
2014
Tags big business, money, obliviousness, travel budget, business travel, long term profitability, budget frozen
Transcript
Boss: The travel budget is frozen so we can meet our income estimates for this quarter. Dilbert: Is that because all business travel is a waste of time or because we no longer care about long-term profitability? Take as long as you need. Boss: Um...
Monday April 28,
2014
Tags business people, work ethic, new line, products, business plan, good track record, useful, accurate, make up numbers
Transcript
Boss: I need you to write a business plan for our new line of products. Dilbert: Is that because business plans have a good track record of being useful and accurate? Boss: No, it's nothing like that. Dilbert: Good, because I plan to make up all of the numbers.
Tuesday April 29,
2014
Tags business people, business plan, corporate dysfunction, dishonesty, incompetence, longer, lumbering monument, seeking feedback, more of the same
Transcript
Dilbert: I had a question about your feedback on my business plan. You called it a "lumbering monument to incompetence, dishonesty and corporate dysfunction." Alice: What's your question? Dilbert: Do you think it should be longer?
Saturday May 10,
2014
Tags electronic mail, obliviousness, business plan, email about plan, rambling and disjointed, no understanding of problem, proposed solution, havent sen email
Transcript
Boss: Did you see my email about your business plan? Dilbert: Was it a rambling and disjointed email that showed no understanding of the problem or the proposed solution? Boss: No. Dilbert: Oh. Then apparently I haven't seen it.
Wednesday August 20,
2014
Tags language, lawyers, simple business deal, best work, backyard
Transcript
Lawyer: I turned your simple business deal into a flaming pile of excrement. It's some of my best work. I don't even understand it myself. Boss: Look what just landed in your backyard. Company Lawyer


