Guy In Hopsital Comic Strips - Page 29

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370 Results for Guy In Hopsital

View 281 - 290 results for guy in hopsital comic strips. Discover the best "Guy In Hopsital" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2013's comic on:


Tags #accusations, #anxiety, #continuous barrage, #firewall, #inevitable villager, #pessimism, #villagers with torches

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Boss: Dilbert, I want you to install the new firewall. Dilbert: Noooo!!!! Why me? Why me? The firewall guy gets blamed for every problem. People will say "Everything worked until you changed the firewall." There will be no rest for me. I will have to defend myself against a continuous barrage of accusations. It's always the firewall! Everyone blames the stinkin' firewall! I surrender to the inevitable! Villagers, grab your pitchforks and torches! Boss: How did he get that way? Wally: I blame the firewall.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2008's comic on:


Tags #traffic, #work, #co worker, #shopping, #week, #attractive nuisance

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secretary: Wally, did you finish the traffic estimates?" Wally: I didn't have time. I spent all week shopping on the company's online supply ordering site. Hey, you can't blame the guy who just uses the attractive nuisance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2008's comic on:


Tags #scary guy, #electric cubicle, #scare off .coworkers, #keith richards effigy

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Dogbert's Electric Cubical Walls Asok: I have a leaner. I want to stun him but not kill him. Dogbert: I recommend our Keith Richards model. Asok: Maybe I should dial it back a little."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 2008's comic on:


Tags #fixed satellite, #surround sound, #water filter, #dates fix it guys

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Dilbert says, "I fixed your satellite dish connection and tuned your surround sound system. Now can we go on our date?" A womany says, "That was our date. In ten minutes I'm dating a guy who will replace the water filter in my refrigerator." Dilbert says, "I can do that." A woman says, "You're welcome to stay and fight him for it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 09, 2008's comic on:


Tags #meeting with boss, #vendors, #customers, #please kill me

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The Boss says, "Asok, you never mentioned any issues this quarter, so I assume you didn't do any work." A man says, "Ooooh, lordy lord! Our vendors are incompetent and our customers are suing us!!!" The Boss says, "Why can't you be more like that guy?" A man says, "Someone please kill me!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2008's comic on:


Tags #plaintiff, #favor of, #weasel, #unanimous, #wants to leave, #juror, #jury, #jurors box, #legal

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JUROR: "We find in favor of the plaintiff dude." "There was some discussion about which one is the plaintiff - the complainy guy or the weasel." "But we were unanimous in not wanting to be here any longer." Another man says, "Aye!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 05, 2008's comic on:


Tags #cost estimates, #eyebrwo, #ghost, #recognize ghost, #helpful, #how to kill, #garlic and shopvac

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A man says, "Alice, when will I get your cost estimates?" Alice says, "When will your one eyebrow turn into two?" The man says, "Is that the ghost of the guy who used to have your job? He makes you look bad because he was always helpful." Alice says, "If you're so helpful, tell me how to kill you." The ghost says, "Dang... try garlic and a shop-vac."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 06, 2010's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #introduce, #ellen, #useless, #annoyed, #waste, #protein, #network, #business

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Dilbert says, "?And this is Ellen. She has no legitimate reason for attending this meeting." Dilbert says, "I assume she's just nosey, or maybe it's a newworking sort of thing." Dilbert says, "And this guy is a total waste of protein." Ellen says, "Maybe next time we should introduce ourselves."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 2010's comic on:


Tags #book deal, #ghost writer, #dog, #publishing, #first draft, #quotes, #knife, #dying, #dead, #wave hand, #animals

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Dogbert Publishing Dogbert says, "I'm assigning a ghost writer to tighten up your first draft." Dogbert says, "Technically, he's not a ghost yet. He's just a guy who lost a knife fight." Asok says, "How long do I have to wait?" Dogbert says, "If you're in a hurry, steer him toward the window."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 2010's comic on:


Tags #marketing, #meeting, #big mouth, #open, #stupid, #product, #guess, #business

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Man says, "Our marketing campaign depends on a word of mouth. Unfortunately, our product is bad." Man says, "So we found a guy with poor judgment and a huge mouth to say good things." Man 2 says, "Present." Dilbert says, "Marketing isn't a real thing, is it?" Man says, "It's mostly guessing."