Hours Worked Comic Strips - Page 29

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

327 Results for Hours Worked

View 281 - 290 results for hours worked comic strips. Discover the best "Hours Worked" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #deadline, #team, #teamwork, #frustration, #rage, #telekinesis, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I worked all night to finish my part. Coworker: I admire your work ethic, Alice. I only finished half of my part. Alice: Wait... if you didn't finish your part, it was a total waste of time for me to finish mine. Coworker: That's one way to look at it. Alice: What time last night did you know you would not be done by today? Coworker: Must have been about six. I got hungry, then I had to unwind. Are you trying to make my head explode by focusing anger at my skull? Alice: First time that worked. Practice paid off.

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #logic, #reasoning, #managing, #managers, #leadership, #quality, #absurd

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You assigned a pack of idiots to my project team. Boss: We can't afford to hire good people. Dilbert: How am I supposed to create world-class products with a team of disruptive idiots? Boss: Try working extra hard. Dilbert: You want us to be more energetic about our bad decisions? Boss: You also have to put in the hours. Dilbert: Are you saying bad decisions, plus long hours, plus lots of enthusiasm, produces great engineering? Boss: Not if you stand around yacking about it all day.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #justice, #trial, #jury duty, #laziness, #lazy, #juror, #legal system

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I got called for jury duty. I'll probably be gone for weeks. I think I would be a good juror. As I understand the job, you sit in a chair doing nothing for hours. Boss: You're supposed to pay attention to the trial. Wally: That's what the other eleven people are for. There's a lot of redundancy in the system. Time to serve up some justice.

Dilbert Is Picked As Company Mascot`

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Picked As Company Mascot` - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #posture, #mascot, #success, #hunchback, #work ethic, #reward

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Management has selected Dilbert to be our new company mascot. His bad posture speaks volumes about his hard work and long hours. Dilbert: Ow! CEO: Did you ever dream you would be so successful? Dilbert: This is exactly how I dreamed it.

Carol Leaves Kids

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Carol Leaves Kids - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #babysitter, #children, #supervision, #date night, #parents, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: Dilbert should be here soon to fill in for the babysitter. Your dad and I need to leave now. Just let him in. We turned off our phones, so don't try to reach us on our date night. Narrator: Two hours later. Boy: I don't think he's coming. Girl: I say we Airbnb this place.

Asok The Uber Driver

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok The Uber Driver - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #driver, #taxi, #ride share, #rideshare, #money, #compensation, #wages

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Today is my first day as an Uber driver. I love the flexibility! I only have to work 75 hours a week and can pay my rent. Man: With plenty left over? Asok: Are you going to finish that sandwich?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #time, #freedom, #free will, #schedule, #work load, #stress, #free time, #breaks, #lunch

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Schedule your training during your lunch hours so it doesn't impact your projects. Dilbert: But... my lunch hour is the only freedom I experience in a typical day. The rest of my time is either scheduled to the minute or driven by whatever crisis is happening. Please don't take my lunch hour and reduce me to nothing but a prisoner in a digital chain gang. I'm barely clinging to my illusion of free will as it is. This could push me over the edge. If you take away my one hour of freedom in the day, I might as well be a robot. Boss: Relax. This is temporary. Dilbert: For how long? Boss: Until I can replace you with a robot.

Wally's Lateness Excuse

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Lateness Excuse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #excuse, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why are you two hours late for work? Wally: Your wife didn't want to bother you, so she called me and asked if I would go to your house and see if she left her curling iron plugged in. Do you believe me, or do you want to risk being the first person she calls next time. Boss: Well played.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #learning, #education, #tutorial, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I love living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet. I'll just hop over to YouTube and learn how to use my new app. Perfect! I can choose from over a hundred different tutorials! It will only take me an hour or so to figure out which one refers to my version of the software. Narrator: One hour later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! These videos are poorly labeled! Narrator: Two hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This guy talks too slowly! Get to the point! Narrator: Three hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why are my menu options different from the tutorial? I hate living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet.

Boss Wears Virtual Reality Goggles

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Wears Virtual Reality Goggles - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #vr, #virtual reality, #deception, #laziness, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I convinced our boss to wear virtual reality goggles all day. Boss: Good job, Wally! I've never seen you work so many hours! Wally: reality is nice, but I find it limiting.