Low Self Esteem Comic Strips - Page 29

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

315 Results for Low Self Esteem

View 281 - 290 results for low self esteem comic strips. Discover the best "Low Self Esteem" comics from Dilbert.com.

Do Not Attack Me

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Do Not Attack Me - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags conflict, paranoia, self-fulfilling prophesy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Are the estimates current? Coworker: Why are you attacking me? Dilbert: I feel like attacking you now. Coworker: I knew it!

Dilbert Characters

Click Rate On Death Alerts

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Click Rate On Death Alerts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags advertising, technology, analytics, smart watch, app, ad, click, clickbait, attention, distraction

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our health app accurately predicts the user's time of death and sends a five-minute warning. Our business model is paid advertising that we disguise as "death alerts." CEO: How's the click-through rate? Boss: Surprisingly low. It's hard to get people's attention these days.

Wally Follows His Passion

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Follows His Passion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags passion, motivation, Advice, misunderstand, misunderstanding, attraction, follow, following

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I'm running low on motivation. What can you do for me? Boss: Follow your passion. Woman: Stop following me. Wally: Dream-killer.

Software Killed Ted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Software Killed Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags invention, software, free will, behavior, murder, anger, glitch, malfunction, control, self control, psychology, engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I have a report that you killed Ted in a cafeteria brawl. Dilbert: Not exactly. My brain stimulator had a software glitch, and it made me homicidal for a minute. Boss: So... you're a murderer, right? Dilbert: Software killed Ted. I was only the weapon.

Dilbert Has Free Will

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Has Free Will - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags free will, crime, invention, murder, control, self control, guilt, innocence

View Transcript

Transcript

Police Officer: Halt! You are under arrest for killing Ted in a cafeteria fight. Dilbert: I am innocent. My brain stimulator had a software glitch that made me do it. Police Officer: But you had free will, right? Dilbert: Do I have to believe in magic just to get arrested?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags watch, technology, signal, symbol, time, punctual, fitbit, wearable tech, outdated, change

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I used to enjoy pointing to my watch and mocking people for being late. But it isn't as fun as it used to be. Dilbert: Is your step count low again?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags martial arts, self defense, robber, mugging, mugger, yoga, dance, fight, beaten, fists, hit

View Transcript

Transcript

Thief: Hey! Give me your wallet. Boss: I must warn you that I am skilled in the arts of yoga, feng shui, and Irish dancing. Dilbert: But it wasn't enough? Boss: He did a fist thing.

Dogbert's Negotiating Class

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Negotiating Class - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags book, deal, negotiating, negotiation, self help, guest artist, josh shipley

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Welcome to Dogbert's one-week training class for negotiators. I believe in leading by example, so this entire course will involve me trying to persuade you to buy my book. If everyone in the class buys my book, you can all have the rest of the week off. Voice: Done.

Expectations

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Expectations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags expectations, misanthrope, happiness, contentment, psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Why is Alice always so angry? Wally: It's a function of her unrealistic expectations. I'm never disappointed because I expect people to be ignorant, self-absorbed, and useless. Asok: Present company excluded? Wally: And there it is.

Blame Rolls Downhill

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Blame Rolls Downhill - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags blame, responsibility, management

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our CEO blamed the Sales department for our low revenue. Sales blamed Marketing and Marketing blamed Engineering. Guess why I'm here. Dilbert: To shield me from unfair accusations?