Sign Stuff Comic Strips - Page 29
Search Filters
Year
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
326 Results for Sign Stuff
View 281 - 290 results for sign stuff comic strips. Discover the best "Sign Stuff" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 20,
2014
Tina Spreads Rumors About Dilbert
Tags #rumor mill, #rumors, #freak accident, #naked, #vacuuming, #spread rumors, #coffee machine, #gossip, #office, #self preservation
Transcript
Tina: I heard you had a freak accident while vacuuming your house naked. Dilbert: That's a rumor. I don't know how that stuff spreads. Tina: Now I feel a little bad that I told thirty people.
Sunday January 04,
2015
Tags #arguing, #personal business, #work ethic, #work load, #work call, #payment, #time management, #handled arguement, #bodd, #employee, #repremand, #money
Transcript
Boss: That doesn't sound like a work call. Carol: It isn't I don't have time to do my personal stuff on my own time. I have to do it on work time. Boss: I pay you to do work stuff, not personal stuff. Carol: Then how would I get all of my personal stuff done? Boss: That's not my problem. Carol: Then why did you bring it up. Boss: Because I need you to do work. Carol: I told you I can't get all of my personal stuff done if I do your work! Boss: Okay, okay. I probably could have handled that better.
Saturday February 28,
2015
Dogbert The Product Designer
Tags #design, #evil, #frustration, #product designer, #torture, #hate people, #styrofoam debris, #invisible buttons
Transcript
Dogbert: I decided to become a product designer because I hate people. I will fill every package with styrofoam debris and affix hard-to-remove stickers all over the cases. I'll make the buttons invisible by making them black on a black surface. Ha ha ha! Dilbert: I've always wondered how this stuff happens.
Monday March 23,
2015
Dogbert The Product Designer
Tags #design, #form, #function, #product design, #product designer, #selfishness, #portfolio
Transcript
Dogbert the Product Designer. Dogbert: You might think my job is to make products that are easy to use. But that wouldn't help me, so instead I design stuff that looks good in my portfolio but is impossible to use. Dilbert: This looks great, but no one will be able to see black buttons on a black case. Dogbert: Not my problem.
Friday March 27,
2015
Wally Won't Oversupply Wisdom
Tags #economist, #Promotion, #jargon, #babble, #deception, #smart people, #obliviousness
Transcript
Boss: Our CEO wants to promote you to Chief Economist because nothing you say makes sense. He thinks that's the sign of a great economist. Wally: It totally is. Boss: Say something smart. Wally: Whoa! I don't want to create an oversupply of wisdom.
Thursday April 23,
2015
Smoking And Iq
Tags #smoking, #cigarettes, #tobacco, #intelligence, #i.q., #interview, #hiring
Transcript
Technical Interview. Dilbert: Do you smoke? Man: What does that have to do with my technical skills? Dilbert: A 2010 Israeli study says smokers have lower intelligence. Man: How do you know stuff like that? Dilbert: Would it be funny if I said I don't smoke?
Sunday June 07,
2015
Tags #internet, #types of people, #internet comment, #Opinion, #discussion, #fame, #technology
Transcript
Man: I'm Dick, from the Internet. I'm the guy who always says ridiculous, angry stuff. I misinterpret every comment you make as an absurd absolute and then I attack it like you are a moron. Dilbert: That doesn't sound fun. Dick: Wow. So you are saying everything in the world needs to be fun. Maybe you should do some research before you embarrass yourself like that again. Dilbert: Hey! You are the guy from the Internet! Dick: I'm sending you five links that are not as relevant as I think they are. Dilbert: You're famous!
Saturday August 22,
2015
Dilbert And The Prison Gang
Tags #prison, #lawyer, #attorney, #Advice, #plead, #trial, #crime, #murder, #technicality, #guilt, #legal
Transcript
Dogbert: Your brain stimulator invention turned you into a murderer. I will argue that you can't get a fail trial by jury of your peers because all of the people like you are already in jail for doing their own stupid stuff. And I signed you up for a prison gang. All you need to do is skin a snitch.
Sunday September 13,
2015
Tags #character, #behavior, #role model, #mentor, #secret, #psychology
Transcript
CEO: Character is how you act when no one is watching. Wally: Now you tell us? I thought you were my role model! Now I learn that you do all of your good stuff when no one is looking. It all makes sense now, because whenever I watch you do anything, it looks sort of dumb. But I'll take your word for it that you're awesome when no one is looking. Do you want to know what I do when no one is looking? CEO: I really, really do not. Wally: I call it character!
Monday September 21,
2015
Hairdresser Illuminati
Tags #hair, #haircut, #hairstyles, #success, #Politics, #candidates, #secret organization, #secret society, #control
Transcript
The Hairdresser Illuminati. Dogbert: Before we start, I'll need to see a list of your political views. Hoo-boy, this is some crazy stuff. I have just the right hairstyle for this. There. That should keep you out of The White House.