Talking Clothes Comic Strips - Page 29

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369 Results for Talking Clothes

View 281 - 290 results for talking clothes comic strips. Discover the best "Talking Clothes" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business casual, clothing, dorks, dress code, fashion, business dorky, unstylish, tan colored, dumb name, new order

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Catbert: Our new dress code is "Business Dorky." Your clothes must be dorky, unstylish, and 50% tan colored. Dilbert: So... business casual? Catbert: That's a dumb name for it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, email, insulting, intelligence, iq, trickery, work ethic, obession, addiction, work smarter, text, efficiency

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Wally: Studies show that continually checking email lowers your functional I.Q. You advised me to "work smarter," so I plan to ignore all of your email from now on. Boss: What if I text you instead? Wally: That's the sort of question that one asks after checking email too often. Boss: Did you just insult me? Wally: That answer is in your email. Boss: Where is it? I don't see any email from you. But I see six new emails that look important. What were we talking about. Wally: You were complimenting me on my efficiency.

Sounded Interesting From Across The Room

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Sounded Interesting From Across The Room - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags conversation, smartphone technology, speed evolve, meta organism, sum of parts, looked interetsing, employees, coffee break, cups, business

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Tina: What are you talking about? It sounds interesting. Dilbert: We were saying that our smartphone technology has caused us to speed-evolve into a meta-organism that is the sum of our connected parts. Tina: In my defense, from across the room it looked interesting.

Dilbert Meets The Mom

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Dilbert Meets The Mom - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, low standards, meeting people, parents, mother, efficiency, ebola, shake hands, Family, relationships

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Woman: Mom, this my date, Dilbert. He only wears tube clothes. Dilbert: For the efficiency. Whoa! Before I touch that paw, have you been to any Ebola hot spots lately? Woman: He has a job. Dilbert: My time has come!

Embellishing Resumes

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Embellishing Resumes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags resume, lying, deception, accomplishments, management, success

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Catbert: I discovered that one of your employees embellished on his resume. Boss: That's outrageous! Fire him for lying to me! Catbert: I'm talking about the version he updated today. It says he accomplished things while working for you. Boss: That doesn't sound right.

Alice Uses Social Media

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Alice Uses Social Media - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags social media, twitter, careers, competition, deception, trick, flame, internet, technology

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Alice: Well, Ted, it looks like you and I are competing for the same promotion. My plan is to use social media to make you look bad. Catbert: I fired Ted for trash-talking you on Twitter. Alice: I don't have a social media account and it still works!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ideas, problems, talking, solution, obliviousness, criticism, honesty

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Boss: Why didn't you tell me our biggest vendor pulled out of the deal? Dilbert: If I told you my problems, you would suggest solutions. Your solutions generally don't make sense. But you are my boss, so I would be obliged to waste time looking into your suggestions. So if you try to solve my problem, I will have two problems instead of one. Boss: Sometimes my ideas are good! Right? Dilbert: That is a dangerous way to think.

Advice

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Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ego, talking, conversation, Advice, insult, insulting, suggestion

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Coworker: Do you want some advice? Dilbert: Nope. Advice is just ego and ignorance disguised as helpfulness. Coworker: Then how will I hear myself talk? Dilbert: The supply cabinet has an awesome echo.

Women Communicate Better

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Women Communicate Better - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags gender, listening, talking, conversation, communication, roles

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Alice: your project failed because there were no women on the team. Women have better communication skills. Every study shows that. Are you listening? Dilbert: Outwardly, yes.

Carol And The Terrorist

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Carol And The Terrorist - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags terrorist, terrorism, racist, race, muslim, assume, assumption, accuse, accusation

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Carol: I hear you're a terrorist sympathizer. Asok: What? No! I'm not even close. I don't want to hate you! Please stop radicalizing me! Carol: Sweating, agitated, he looks suspicious to me. Asok: Who are you talking to???!