Drive Carefully Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

118 Results for Drive Carefully

View 21 - 30 results for drive carefully comic strips. Discover the best "Drive Carefully" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 1999's comic on:


Tags #dogberts tech support, #hard reboot, #listen carefully, #rent a van, #dynamite, #stolen dynamite, #main relay station, #talk, #aim bazooka, #van

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sit at a computer. Caption: "Dogbert's Tech Support" Dogbert says, on the phone "You'll need to do a hard reboot. Listen carefully." Dogbert says, "Rent a van and fill it with stolen dynamite. Park it near the power company's main relay station." Dilbert says, "Can we talk?" Dogbert wags his tail and says on the phone, "...Now aim the bazooka at the van."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 29, 1999's comic on:


Tags #new laptops, #osbournes, #sloppy drive, #operating, #internet time

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, The Boss and Wally sit in a meeting. The Boss reads from his notes. The Boss says, "All new computers will be osbornes." The Boss says, "They come with something called a floppy drive." Dilbert says to Wally, "Somethimg tells me we're not operating on 'Internet Time.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2000's comic on:


Tags #alice date, #cafe, #dinner date, #drive boss nuts, #honesty, #indifference arouses, #using you, #vp and engineer

View Transcript

Transcript

VP: Alice, maybe we shouldn't date, Im a Vp and you're an engineer in my division. Alice: Sheesh, Get over yourself. IM just using you to drive my boss nuts, VP: Your indifference arouses me! I will make you mine! Alice: VPs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 25, 2000's comic on:


Tags #didn't ask, #erased hard drive, #mansplain, #reformatting hard drive, #step aside, #upgardes

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted says to Noriko, "Step aside. I'm from I.S." Noriko replies, "I didn't ask for any upgrades. " Ted answers, "That's what they all say until..." Noriko says to Ted in a horrified voice, "It's reformatting my hard drive!" Ted replies, "That's ten in a row. Maybe it's me."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 09, 2002's comic on:


Tags #unemployed, #drive electric car, #abs, #not romantic, #turn on, #socialize, #mingle, #party, #drinks

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches a woman at a party and says, "I'm unemployed and I drive an electric car." Dilbert continues, "These are my abs. I talk too much about myself and I'm not romantic." Dilbert continues, "I realize it's a long shot but does any of that turn you on?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 2002's comic on:


Tags #all natural, #cd drive, #holistic tech support, #natural and holistic, #tree bark, #meditate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert talks into a telephone headset, "Hello. This is Dogbert's all-natural and holistic tech support." The man on the other end listens. Dogbert continues, "Try stuffing tree bark in the CD drive and meditating." Dogbert continues, "No, of course it won't damage anything; it's all natural!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 10, 2003's comic on:


Tags #drive ny management, #sprayed cubicle, #irrational orders, #waddled away, #wadlle, #funny word, #empathy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is home; his arm is in a sling. He says to Dogbert, "I'm a victim of drive-by management." Dilbert continues, "He sprayed my cubicle with irrational orders and waddled away." Dogbert responds, "Heh-heh, waddle is a funny word." Dilbert waves his free hand and says, "I feel your empathy slipping away."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 2004's comic on:


Tags #target market, #one customer, #10 thousand units, #shop carefully

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "Our target market is people who don't shop carefully." "Our product is designed to attack the user and force him to reorder." "We only have one customer but we've sold 10,000 units."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2004's comic on:


Tags #drive by management, #whats hi sanme, #out run, #answer no questions, #need for clarification, #we're dead

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: It's time for some drive-by-management. Don't forget to do the thing for what hs name or else we're dead. must ...outrun cries for.... clarification.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2004's comic on:


Tags #blinding flashes, #sightless, #didn't drive car, #can't do that

View Transcript

Transcript

Your blinding flashes of the obvius made me sightless for three days. "I hope you didn't drive your car. You're not supoosed to do that when you're blind." "GAAA!!!" "I'm upsetting you."