Life Expectency Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

392 Results for Life Expectency

View 21 - 30 results for life expectency comic strips. Discover the best "Life Expectency" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #great, #things, #dog, #nap, #time, #want, #tired, #hate, #life, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert thinks, "One of the great things about being a dog is that we can take a nap any time we want." Dogbert continues thinking, "Sometimes we do it because we're tired." Dogbert lies on his back as Dilbert walks by carrying a briefcase. Dogbert thinks, "But mostly, we do it to make you hate your life."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #world, #worse, #been, #born, #wait, #turn, #computer, #every, #night, #electricity, #meaning, #life, #today, #bedroom, #light, #day

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "Would the world be any worse off if I'd never been born?" Dilbert thinks, "Wait . . . If not for me, who would turn off this computer every night. I'm saving electricity!" Dilbert arrives at home carrying his briefcase and says to Dogbert, "I found meaning in my life today." Dogbert says, "You left your bedroom light on all day."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #privacy, #Dilbert, #supreme court, #nomination, #hearings, #opinions, #Right, #life, #idiots

View Transcript

Transcript

At Dogbert's nomination hearings, a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee asks Dogbert, "Do you have any opinions on the right to privacy?" Dogbert replies, "No. In fact, I've never formed an important opinion in my entire life." The senator says, "You must think we're idiots." Dogbert replies, "Okay, I've formed ONE opinion . . . But that's all."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #meaning of life, #dictionary, #expected, #thesaurus, #hill

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert asks, "Do you ever wonder about the meaning of life, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "I used to." Dogbert continues, "But I looked it up in the dictionary under 'L' and there it was - the meaning of life." Dogbert continues, "It was less than I expected." Dilbert asks, "Did you try the thesaurus?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #bed, #purpose in life, #today, #hungry, #toasted, #bagel, #great, #empty, #stomach, #think, #breakfast

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert lies in bed thinking, "Why should I get up today? What is my purpose in life?" Dilbert thinks, "I'm hungry. A toasted bagel would taste great." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table eating breakfast. Dilbert says, "Maybe the purpose of life is eating bagels." Dogbert says, "You shouldn't try to think on an empty stomach."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #flush, #goldie, #john, #ugly, #stupid, #fish, #life, #rivalry, #suicide note, #schools, #pun

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of an empty fishbowl with his arms on his hips. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "You expect me to believe that Goldie flushed HIMSELF down the john??!" Dogbert replies, "Surely you don't believe that I ended his ugly, stupid fish life in a fit of pet rivalry . . ." Dilbert looks at a small piece of paper and says, "Explain how a fish can write a suicide note." Dogbert says, "I've heard they have schools . . ."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #bob, #dinosaur, #meaningless, #existence, #ironically, #ruined, #life

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Bob, sometimes I wonder if there's a place in this world for a sensitive rat like me." Ratbert continues, "I can't live the hollow, meaningless shell of existence that others so ironically call 'life.'" Ratbert concludes, "I want to make a difference to people." Bob says, "Well, you ruined MY day."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #experiments, #rationalize, #quality, #life, #skunkopotamus, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at the table working with test tubes and lab equipment. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Sometimes I wonder if it's ethical to do these genetic experiments." Dilbert continues, "But I rationalize it because it will help improve the quality of life." Dogbert asks, "What are you making?" Dilbert replies, "Skunkopotamus."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #ridiculous, #Dilbert, #supercomputer, #create, #model, #predict, #life, #brain, #chemistry, #patterns, #cause and effect, #free will, #mad, #implies

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at a desk and works on his supercomputer. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm using my new supercomputer to create a model that can predict your entire life." Dilbert continues, "You see, everything, including your brain chemistry, is subject to predictable patterns of cause and effect . . ." Dogbert replies, "That's ridiculous. It implies that we have no free will." Dilbert looks at the monitor and says, "Next, you start getting really mad at me."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer, #squirrels, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #script, #life, #super, #model, #predict, #future, #nut mines, #evil, #kidnapped

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert hands a book to Dogbert and says, "Here's the full script of the rest of your life. My supercomputer model predicted it." Dogbert reads the script and says, "Well, according to this I'll be kidnapped by evil squirrels and forced to work in their nut mines." Dilbert says, "They get me too." Dogbert says, "I didn't know that evil squirrels had nut mines." Dilbert replies, "It's probably too late to do anything about it."