Surgery Comic Strips - Page 3
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31 Results for Surgery
View 21 - 30 results for surgery comic strips. Discover the best "Surgery" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 21,
2006
Monday April 12,
2010
Tags nose job, health insurance, surgery, cloth over nose, good deal, veterinarian, dog nose, squirrel, medical
Transcript
Asok says, "Our health plan doesn't cover nose jobs, so I used the market system to bargain for a good deal." Asok says, "I learned that a veterinarian is just like a doctor, but cheaper." Asok says, "Do you smell a squirrel?"
Tuesday April 13,
2010
Tags nose job, health insurance, surgery, dog nose, veterinarian, lunch time, eat, engineer, function, rationalize, medical, engineering
Transcript
Asok says, "I probably shouldn't have gone to a veterinarian for my nose job." Asok says, "But as an engineer, I value function over form, and the airflow is actually quite good." Dilbert says, "You might be rationalizing a little." Asok says, "I pity you with your inefficient nostrils."
Wednesday April 14,
2010
Tags nose job, snout, dog nose, health insurance, surgery, veterinarian, career, match looks, engineer, shake hands, art department, medical, engineering
Transcript
The Boss says, "Our policy is to put people in careers that match their looks." Asok says, "I thought that was a coincidence." The Boss says, "Your botched nose job makes you too unconventional to be an engineer." Asok says, "No!" Woman says, "Welcome to the art department." Man says, "Man, I wish I was brave enough to get a snout."
Sunday February 15,
2009
Tags reprimand, ridiculous, unwanted, confused, group
Transcript
A woman says, "Wally, we'd like to transition your role in this project." woman says, "During the first week, you were the lead engineer." woman says, "Going forward, you'll be in more of an advisory role." woman says, "And by that I mean we have a restraining order against you." woman says, "You're not allowed within 100 yards of the conference room." woman says, "We've changed our cell phone numbers and e-mail addresses." woman says, "And we're all having reconstructive surgery so you won't recognize us in the hallway." The boss says, "Did you accomplish anything this week?" Wally says, "Mary, is that you?"
Sunday June 12,
2005
Tags tuesday off, kids tonsils, not suregon, rare blood type, donate blood, moral supprt, real winner, immoral and sick, cold on tuesday
Transcript
"I need Tuesday off because my son is having his tonsils removed." "Since when do you know how to remove tonsils?" "Um...I won't be performing the surgery myself." "Do you have a rare blood type that you need to donate?" "No. Actually, I was planning on sitting in the waiting room to give him moral support." "So your kid is immoral and sick? He sounds like a real winner." "What I mean is that I plan to have a cold on Tuesday." "Well, I can see where your kid gets it from."
Sunday April 18,
2004
Tags extreme makeover, buisness, Dogbert, rework a face, plastic surgery, scary, human makeover, ears, antlers
Transcript
Dogbert: "I'm going into the extreme makeover business." "I'm planning to take it to the next level." "You'd look good with antlers." "And the nose has to go." Man: "Go?" "Your tiny ears are out of proportion." "These are ears." "I'll also rearrange your fat so you can't see it." "I'll toss in a few extras after you're unconscious, no charge." "Guess how old I am."
Sunday May 05,
2013
Tags cats & kittens, surgery, surgeon, left something inside, left stuff, wallet, car keys, cat, meow, animals, medical
Transcript
Carol: It's your surgeon. He says he might have left something inside you. Boss: What??! A sponge? A scalpel? Carol: No... his watch. And... his car keys... and wallet. He says he used your torso to store his valuables while he went for a run. Boss: Meow! Carol: I'll ask about that.
Saturday September 16,
2017
Reanimated Employee
Tags soul, death, near death experience, heaven, hell, medical
Transcript
Dilbert: How did you end up with no soul? Randy: I died during surgery and my soul went to the afterlife before doctors reanimated my body. Dilbert: I thought the soul returns when that happens. Randy: You're thinking of heaven.
Thursday November 23,
2017
Doctor Will Operate
Tags laziness, happiness, satisfaction, aspirations, psychology
Transcript
Doctor: The MRI shows unusual activity in the laziness region of your brain. Normally, I would recommend brain surgery, but your brain also registers an unusually high level of happiness. Wally: So... how do we handle this? Doctor: I'm going to operate on myself to make me more like you.
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