Bottled Air To Morons Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

212 Results for Bottled Air To Morons

View 21 - 30 results for bottled air to morons comic strips. Discover the best "Bottled Air To Morons" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #easier, #elbonia, #Dogbert, #convince, #despotic, #ruler, #airport, #skeet-shooting, #range

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in a giant slingshot holding his suitcase. Dilbert says, "I wish there were an easier way to fly in Elbonia." Dilbert flies through the air over Elbonia. Dilbert thinks, "I've got to find Dogbert and convince him to stop being the despotic ruler of Elbonia." Dogbert, who is wearing a miter, sits on the back of an Elbonian and points a rifle toward the sky. The Elbonian says, "But, sire, this is the airport, not the skeet-shooting range." Dogbert yells, "Pull!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #elbonians, #gate, #pickaxes, #rakes, #emergency, #despot, #escape, #slingshot, #remind, #garden, #festival

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a throne wearing a miter. Dilbert yells, "A mob of Elbonians is at the gate!! They have pickaxes and rakes!!" Dogbert looks shocked. Dilbert and Dogbert run up the stairs to the roof. Dogbert yells, "Quick!! We'll take the emergency despot escape slingshot!!" As Dilbert and Dogbert fly through the air overhead, an Elbonian says to the crowd behind him, "Did anybody remind the king that today is the garden festival?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 24, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #wallet, #money, #rich, #return, #owner, #honest, #sam grooper, #ruthless, #criminal, #divorced, #wife, #ruth, #reward, #expected, #slap, #scram, #gun, #morons

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert walk on the sidewalk. Dilbert points ahead of them and says, "Look, Dogbert - a wallet." Dilbert bends down, picks up the wallet and says, "It's full of money." Dogbert shouts, "We're rich!!" Dilbert says, "We must return it to its owner." Dogbert shouts, "We're honest!" Dilbert says, "His business card says 'Sam Grouper, ruthless criminal.'" Dilbert says, "Let's hope 'ruthless' means he divorced his wife named Ruth." The criminal answers his door with a gun in his hand. Dilbert says, "Mr. Grouper, we found your wallet. No reward is expected." Sam points the weapon at Dilbert and says, "Hand it over. Give me your wallet too, then slap yourselves around and scram." Dilbert's glasses are bent and his clothes are disheveled. Dogbert holds his hands up and says, "We're morons!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 09, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #smell, #suspected, #stopped, #neighbor, #cat, #trial, #pat, #pet

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase. Dilbert asks, "How was your day, Dogbert?" Dogbert sniffs the air and asks, "Hey! What's that smell?" Dogbert smells Dilbert's hand and says, "Just as I suspected - you stopped to pet the neighbor's cat!" Dilbert says, "It meant nothing. It was more of a pat than a pet." Dilbert dials the phone and says, "Save your lies for the trial."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #look, #car, #most, #important, #anti-lock, #breaks, #reinforced, #summer, #automatic, #passenger, #side, #air, #bag

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a pillow listening to the radio. Dilbert says, "Dogbert, come look at our new car!" They stand next to an automobile. Dilbert says, "It has all of the most important safety features." Dilbert continues, "You got your anti-lock brakes, your reinforced bumpers, your automatic seatbelts and your driver-side air bag." Dogbert says, "I didn't hear 'passenger side air bag' in that list." Dilbert says, "It turns out that it's only economical to save the person who makes the buying decision." Dilbert says, "But I got a baby seat in case you want to use that." Dogbert says angrily, "Well, thank you for letting me choose between humiliation and death. I've got a better idea." Dogbert drives the car and Dilbert sits in the passenger seat. Dilbert says, "Ooh . . . Just wait until MY turn." Dogbert says, "Watch me ram that car."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 06, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #big, #ed, #hulking, #backwards, #waving, #arms, #people, #refer, #debris

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert, "Look out! Big Ed is hulking backwards waving his arms again!" Big Ed bumps into Wally and Dilbert and they spill their coffee on themselves. Wally and Dilbert lie on the floor with their legs in the air. Dilbert says, "Big people can be so annoying." Wally replies, "I just wish he wouldn't refer to us as debris."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #masterpiece, #Dilbert, #discovered, #art, #form, #brilliant, #considered, #abstract, #expression, #inner, #feelings, #gullible, #morons

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at the table drawing on a piece of paper. He thinks, "Another masterpiece." Dilbert asks, "What are you doing, Dogbert?" Dogbert replies, "I discovered a highly efficient art form." Dogbert explains, "I've brilliantly combined the simplicity of charcoal with the simplicity of abstract expression." Dogbert continues, "The secret is to let your deepest inner feelings guide the charcoal." Dilbert looks at a drawing and says, "Inner feelings?! What inner feelings? These are scribbles." Dilbert continues, "All I see here is that a cynical dog thinks art buyers are a bunch of gullible morons." Dogbert says, "Wow! I nailed that one!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 17, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #leader, #vegetarian, #movement, #warning, #cow, #egg, #industry, #retrsopect, #floor, #command, #elevator

View Transcript

Transcript

An overweight man enters Dogbert's office and says as he pants and wheezes, "Are you Dogbert, the new leader of the vegetarian movement?" Dogbert replies, "Yes." The man continues to pant as he says, "I have a warning from the cow and egg industry . . . You must ERK!" The man lies on the ground with his feet in the air. Dogbert says, "In retrospect, it was pretty clever of us to rent a third floor command center with no elevator."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 1992's comic on:


Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #footsteps, #demagogue, #book, #unmarried, #Men, #scum, #successful, #write, #hate, #disguised, #science, #moles, #morons, #underground, #movement

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says to Dogbert, "I'm following in your footsteps so I can be a demagogue too." Ratbert continues, "Your book 'Unmarried Men are Scum' was so successful that I decided to write my own hate book disguised as science!" Ratbert holds up a manuscript and continues, "I call it 'Moles are Morons.'" Three moles wearing sunglasses sneak up behind Ratbert. Dogbert asks, "Were you aware that moles have a strong underground movement?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 1992's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #government, #general, #kill, #encounter, #space, #aliens, #governments, #track, #record, #budget, #cutbacks, #air, #support

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands next to a man in a military uniform. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "The government sent a General to kill me for talking about my encounter with space aliens." Dilbert continues, "I was scared at first, but when you think about the government's track record, well, my odds are pretty good . . ." Dilbert continues, "Especially after all the budget cutbacks." The General says into a walkie-talkie radio, "Dang it! Where's my air support?!!"