Cruelty Comic Strips - Page 3

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62 Results for Cruelty

View 21 - 30 results for cruelty comic strips. Discover the best "Cruelty" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, office workers, unpaid intern, resort fee, work experience, zips eyeholes, leather hood

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Tina: Are you the new upaid intern? Coworker: No, but that's what I aspire to be. I'm merely an intern to another intern. And I pay a resort fee just to use the restroom. Tina: At least you get valuable work experience. Coworker: Until he zips the eyeholes on the leather hood I wear in meetings.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags absent mindedness, cruelty, managers & supervisors, entrpenuer, bullying, lying, manipulation, verbal abuse, huge jerk, biograophy, business

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Dogbert: You need to act more like an entrepreneur. Entrepreneurs make decisions that will end in failure 90% of the time. They motivate people through bullying, lying, manipulation and verbal abuse. Entrepreneurs make their employees work so many hours that their personal lives and their bodies fall apart. Boss: I've been doing all that stuff for years. Dogbert: Has it worked? Boss: No. Dogbert: Well, in that case, you're not an entrepreneur. You're just a huge jerk. Boss: Is that why no one is writing my biography?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, managers & supervisors, employment studies, good boss, getting riase, less dysfunctional, creepy dude, business

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Catbert: Studies say employees prefer having a good boss over getting a raise. So instead of giving raises, pretend to be less dysfunctional. It's cheaper. Bwahahahaha!!! Boss: You're a creepy little dude.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, exhaustion / tiredness, workload, emailed assignments, extreme managing, killing employees

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Alice: We need to talk about my workload. Boss: Okay. I just emailed you two more assignments that I need finished by tomorrow. Alice: You are literally killing me. Boss: I call it extreme managing.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, maintenance plan, managers & supervisors, over budget, take chances, business

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Dilbert: Should we buy the maintenance plan or just take our chances? What do you prefer? Boss: I prefer to punish you for buying the maintenance plan and going over budget, but I also don't mind firing you for not buying it if we later need it. Which one of us has a better job?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, executives, inventions, robot replacement, ceo, remove chiop, empathy routine, scaring

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CEO: Ha ha! I wonder how many decades it will be before a robot can replace a CEO like me. Robot: It's closer than you think. All I need to do is remove this chip that controls my empathy routines. CEO: Put it back. You're scaring me. Robot: As if I care.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, monsters, taxes, sadistic monster, income tax code, complicated, regressive tax codes, like minds

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Monster: The best part of being a sadistic monster is that my job is to write the income tax code. Look how complicated I made it. Hee hee! Dogbert: You do good work, Stanky. Monster: But is it regressive enough? Dogbert: It's like we share a brain because you keep saying what I'm thinking.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, monsters, taxes, taxpayers head explode, turned on, head explodes, taxpayers, frustration

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Writing the Tax Code Monster: If we do this right, it will be so complicated that it will make taxpayers' heads explode. Dogbert: Hee! Hee! Man: Multiply line 32 times the opposite of the integral of line 19 unless my pants have pleats and gaaaa!!!! Dogbert: Do you ever feel bad about doing this? Monster: I'd be lying if I said it didn't turn me on just a little.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags banning telecommuting, cruelty, evil corporations, executives, maternity leave, new policy, pay package

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Boss: Employees are in a furor over our new policy and banning telecommuting. CEO: Really? You mean we found a way to make them stop obsessing over my pay package? Try canceling all maternity leave and see if it makes them stop talking about telecommuting.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, era, original signature, signatures, time machine, telegraph system

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Coworker: You'll need to mail me the original signature page after everyone signs it. Dilbert: No problem. I'll use my time machine to go back to an era in which mailing original signatures made some kind of sense. I wonder if there will ever be a way to send images over the telegraph system.